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"The Jay Leno Show:" Lessons we learned
"The Jay Leno Show" ends tonight, and this will likely be the last time in our lives that something like this rolls around again.
So, let us take a deep breath. Let us ponder the meaning of life, the meaning of network TV decisions, and finally the meaning of meaninglyless, thereby reducing Jay Leno once and for all to an existential puzzle...
To the list!
1.) "The Jay Leno Show" wasn't as bad as everyone on my side of the computer screen made it out to be. It was - to use the cliche - what it was: A competently produced version of "Tonight" that aired at 10. Jay's monologue was as it was ever thus - 28 jokes, 13 minutes, almost all topical; commercial break, first guest, etc.
2.) The problem wasn't Jay. The problem was the time period.
3.) Never ever ever (never) believe network executives when they tell you something is the Second Coming. Even they don't believe it. Why should you?
4.) Network executives are much more like TV critics than even TV critics care to admit - that is, they get more things wrong than they do right (or chartiably, they get as many things wrong as they do right.)
5.) "The Jay Leno Show" was an insurance policy. Readers of this blog know my theory on this and I will restate again - that Jay at 10 was a shrewd ploy just in case Conan's "Tonight Show" didn't work. Keep Jay in the house just in case. The suits were willing to get napalmed by the press if Conan's numbers failed and Jay was sent back to 11:35. I also believe Jay always knew at least intuitively that this was the general plan. Believe me - these guys aren't as dumb as they look. In fact, poor Conan may be the one who didn't read this.
6.) Why didn't the press figure this out? Haven't you learned by now, reader, we never figure out anything? We are stenographers - we write what the networks tell us and then when it all goes to ka-flooey, we say (in unision) - "we told you this was going to happen." See. I just did.
7.) Jay probably won't be hurt by this debacle. In fact, I predict he'll be back at number one by summer. If he gets just 4 million viewers, he's bossman again.
8.) Dave won't be hurt either. Letterman comes out of this looking like a million bucks. Imagine! The generosity of giving his rival exposure during the most viewed TV program in history. What a mensch.
9.) NBC has no idea what would happen if Jay - God forbid because I really do like him - gets hit by a bus while Jaywalking.
10.) NBC has no plan, for the future of late night, and if they tell you they do, then see #.3.
Finally, farewell Jay. We'll see you back on the TV in March.
Tags: the jay leno show, david letterman, jay leno, conan o'brien, nbc, cbs
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Super Bowl 44: The (commercial) winners
Hey kids, what did you think of that Super Bowl.
(The Saints win. I'm happy. Next year, the Giants.)
But I speak of the ads...
Not good.
With the exception of the CBS house ad for Letterman and "Late Show."
PHOTOS: Super Bowl XLIV: Colts vs. Saints
Ahhhhhh. Now that's what I'm talking 'bout. A commercial that breaks news. Even if you have to ask yourself - "what news? " Didn't these guys hate each other? Why is Oprah here? oh..that's right. She just interviewed Jay...
There will be a lot of chatter about this the next few days - and NBC will be happy because Leno wraps on Tuesday.
But the obvious question will be: What does it all mean?
At this moment, right now, at 11:02 after a terrific Super Bowl, the only answer I can muster is: Nothing.
But give me a couple hours. Am sure I'll come up with something.
Meanwhile, here's my wrap for tomorrow's Newsday.
See if you agree, or disagree. But frankly, I was disappointed. This was a rather sad Super Bowl commercial spectacle and I most certainly do have a theory about that.
Here it is: We are in the worst recession/depression in more than eighty years. The advertising industry is in terrible shape too. Tonight was a reflection of that.
Some good. Some bad. Some smart. Some sad.
But memorable - truly memorable Super Bowl XLIV commercials?
Of course, there was at least one. (Letterman and Leno.)
Otherwise, let the debates begin, or perhaps by now, they've already ended. And
honestly, it will be very difficult to find anyone, anywhere, who will say "boy,
THAT was $200 million well spent!"
Overall it was a disappointing commercial spectacle. Certainly there was some fun, and provocative, moments. But very very few. Even the Tim Tebow ad - full of controversial sturm and drang - ended with a tackle of his poor mother. What exactly was that about?
Indeed, the Tebow ad - featuring the Florida Heisman trophy winner and his mother - was more of a curiosity than a lightning rod. "I call him my miracle baby," his mother said, referring - though not specifically saying - to a doctor's recommendation some year's earlier that she has an abortion. By the commercial's conclusion, he sacked her (seriously), and mom said: "You're not nearly as tough as I am." (There was nothing offensive about the ad, except that last part.)
My top five picks...
1.) David Letterman, Jay Leno, Oprah Winfrey: In which the queen of daytime brokers peace in late night. This was one of the great ads in Super Bowl history - a piece a theater that we (or at least I) ll remember for a long time.
2.) Dodge Charger: What we all expect from terrific Super Bowl ads. The guy who promises to give his wife everything - "I will carry your lip balm...watch your vampire shows with you.." - but he gets to
buy the muscle car.
3.) Bridgestone Killer Whale. Charging down the pier, the car fishtails - or whaletails - and the ol' orca comes tumbling out the back into the drink. Beautifully directed and executed.
4.) Google: This one came late in the game, and there was much to admire - a wonderful quirky funny payoff. But why is Google advertising in the Super Bowl? Worried about Bing?
5.) A tie: Vizio and Motorola. Two terrific commercials. Vizio, the TV manufacturer, made an ad that forced me to...Google; and Motorola and Megan Fox? How could this one go wrong? It didn't.
Now the stinkers:
1.) Coke/Mr. Burns: This one is debatable but how can an iconic beverage take an iconic show – along with one of its iconic characters, Mr. Burns – and make it dull and foolish? Mr. Burns does not smile. He never has – except maliciously. Yet Coke turned him into a nice guy? Meh…
2.) Doritos: Some of the most memorable ads in SB (recent) history and those from last night were just creepy. (The guy falling out of the coffin…?!!)
3.) Go Daddy: Again, a terrible waste of money.
4.) Monster.com: Was that a beaver or badger playing the violin (or viola?)
5.) Lance Armstrong and Michelob Light. Why, Lance. Whyyy???
PHOTOS: Super Bowl XLIV: Colts vs. Saints
Tags: super bowl, david letterman, jay leno, cbs
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Grammys: 26 million, or 10 m under the Oscars
Best in six years.
Almost absurdly bigger audience than the Emmys gets these days.
Not even in the same universe as the Tonys.
And only 10 million less than last year's Oscars.
What is the Grammys secret and what might be an obvious solution before the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences?
Simple: Nominate Beyonce for six awards, and then make sure she turns up at the Shrine to receive the bounty.
Here are the fax from CBS:
From 8:00-11:30 PM, THE GRAMMY AWARDS posted a 14.3/23 in households with 25.80m viewers, 10.6/24 in adults 25-54, 9.8/24 in adults 18-49 and 9.1/24 in adults 18-34. From 8:00-11:00 PM, CBS dominated the competition in all key ratings measures.
Compared to last year's broadcast (on February 8, 2009), CBS was up +28% in households (from 11.2/18), +36% in adults 25-54 (from 7.8/18), +32% in both adults 18-49 (from 7.4/18) and adults 18-34 (from 6.9/18) and added +6.75m viewers (from 19.05m, +35%).
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Grammys: "Earth Song" in 3-D
You know "Earth Song" - a good chunk of which was seen in "This is It" - I would imagine. CBS just said a 3-D version will air on the Grammys - this will in fact be the centerpiece of the entire Jan. 31 broadcast. Target will be distributing 15 million 3D glasses for free, beginning Tuesday, January 26. The 52nd Annual Grammy Awards air January 31 on CBS. (I wonder if they'll work for "Avatar?" Just a very idle neither here-nor-there thought...)
Now, "Earth Song"...
Tags: earth song, michael jackson, cbs, the grammys
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Ferguson: He's been moved too
Hey kids, let's see what Craigers said last night.
Craig Ferguson: That other late late night guy who may end up king of the world when all this late night fuss is over and done with...
(And are you following me on Twitter yet? If not, why not? I know..you've got a life...important stuff to do...but just in case you don't...
Click here to get the latest TV scoop on Twitter from moi!
Here's Craig...oh wait. He's not here. He's been moved to a new time slot.
This is funny. Well worth seeing...the monologue follows.
Tags: craig ferguson, cbs
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Homer Simpson does "Top Ten"
This you gotta see.
Drop everything.
Watch.
Now.
(No...I saw you do something else...stop it right this instance. WATCH.)
Lord, if this were ONLY in 3-d.
Homer Simpson does the Top Ten.
The whole Simpsons family was supposed to do this but - news bulletin - they made a wrong turn inside the Newark terminal and, well, let's just say they won't be doing the Top Ten tonight. Homer made it through. I wonder why...
Click here to get the latest TV scoop on Twitter from Uncle Verne
Tags: the simpsons, late show with david letterman, cbs, fox, homer simpson, top ten, jay leno, santa's little helper, maggie, marge, lisa, bart, simpsons
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"Survivor:" Tom Westman's back
Got to hand it to CBS - that was a very clever "Survivor:" Heroes vs. Villains" promotional launch last night.
Happened early in the People's Choice A's, when Jeff Probst unveiled the first promo, sending an army of "Survivornistas" into overdrive, wondering, "is that...who..is that...is that who I think it is...oh no...not him/her again..." Etc.
In any event, Sayville's own Tom Westman is among the crowd. A very good guy, Tom, and winner of the 10th. I'm gonna take a wild swing here and suggest he's one of the heroes. Russell is of course back too. 'Nother swing - a villain?
Then, this morning...CBS shipped out a whole bunch of "Survivor" interviews. Here's a few.
Meanwhile, thanks to Boston TV Examiner's Michael Langston Moore for assembling this list - looks complete and accurate to me:
Show starts Feb. 11...mark calenders...
Heroes: Colby (Australia, All-Stars) Rupert (Pearl Islands, All-Stars) Tom (Palau) Stephenie (Palau, Guatemala) Cirie (Exile Island, Fans vs Favorites) Candice (Cook Islands) James (China, Fans vs Favorites) Amanda (China, Fans vs Favorites) Sugar (Gabon) JT (Tocantins).
Villains: Jerri (Australia, All-Stars) Rob (Marquesas, All-Stars) Sandra (Pearl Islands) Danielle (Exile Island) Parvati (Cook Islands, Fans vs Favorites) Courtney (China) Randy (Gabon) Coach (Tocantins) Tyson (Tocantins) Russell (Samoa).
Here's Tom...
Russell!!
Cirie!
Rupppeeeerrrttttt!
Tags: survivor, survivor:heroes vs. villains, tom westman, sayville, cbs, survivor, Colby (Australia, All-Stars), Rupert (Pearl Islands, All-Stars) Tom (Palau), Stephenie (Palau, Guatemala), Cirie (Exile Island, Fans vs Favorites), Candice (Cook Islands), James (China, Fans vs Favorites), Amanda (China, Fans vs Favorites), Sugar (Gabon) JT (Tocantins) Villains: Jerri (Australia, All-Stars) Rob (Marquesas, All-Stars) Sandra (Pearl Islands) Danielle (Exile Island) Parvati (Cook Islands, Fans vs Favorites) Courtney (China) Randy (Gabon) Coach (Tocantins) Tyson (Tocantins) Russell (Samoa). Here's Tom...
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Jay Leno: Changes afoot? (abreast? atoe?)
I'd like to say you read it here first, but if I'm wrong, then forget it - you didn't read it here first.
But I think NBC is about to make a significant decision about "The Jay Leno Show."
"I think" only because I don't "know." But the elements are all in place. Continued pressure at 10. Horrific debacle for affils at 11. Meeting with the press at the TCA this Sunday. Then...tick, tick, tick...the big annual meeting with affiliates a little while after that.
It won't be good enough for NBC to mouth the usual bullsh***.
Like...
"...we're staying the course..."
Or...
"...we have confidence in this ..."
Or...
"..it's working really well. Honest injun..."
Or ...
"...we feel your pain [name a station in Minnesota/KC/San Angelo..."
Or even...
"...please please people! Patience! Wait until after the winter Olympics and then we'll have a better sense..."
I guarantee, the first NBC exec who stands on the stage and tells affiliates "..we feel your pain...bear with us...we know what we're doing.. really, we do...wait until the Os are over"... there will be a full scale riot, and the police or maybe National Guard will be called in.
After affiliates have burned the dump to the ground, and NBC execs along with it, then they'll head to Philly, where they'll storm the Comcast tower.
This is war. It's ugly. They want change.
They are about to get it.
What wil they get?
My hunch, based on reporting about the TV industry over two centuries - not the entire span of these centuries, mind you, but the end and beginning of 'em - tells me they'll drop "Leno" on Thursdays and maybe Fridays.These are good nights to dump "Leno." Because a.) There's mucho movie ad business dinero to be sucked up on those nights; b.) Thursday is a classic NBC night; c.) You don't wanna split the week by, say, having Jay on Monday then a drama on Tuesday, etc. Looks bad, stupid, silly and will weaken Jay even more. d.) Most important of all, need these nights to help promote other stuff on other nights, and need all the firepower they can get.
Will they cancel "Leno?" No. I don't believe so. Just a nip and a tuck. NBC will pretend it's "no big deal...we planned this all along...etc. etc."Maybe even Jay will like this. I suspect he doesn't have a choice.
The network has ten hours of new dramas in the can, including a David Shore/"Rockford Files" re-make. This is a 10 p.m. show, and it ain't going 10 p.m. on Saturdays.
So get ready friends, It's comin'...it's comin'....
Tags: jay leno, nnc, david shore, TCA, press tour, jeff zucker, comcast, cbs, abc, the rockford files, nbc affiliate meeting
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'Survivor' 19: Natalie White wins; Russ back?
Teensy bit suprising. But not hugely surprising.
Did anyone anywhere believe Russell Hantz would win "Survivor" - the 19th season - especially when he went up against a "nice" cast member like Natalie White?
Nope.
Wasn't gonna happen.
Ben said it best - a choice between HER and Russell?
Russell said, "I feel like I played the best strategic game in history."
Up to a point, Russell. You forgot the final jury count. Oops.
Simple as that. Which is why Natalie won. (Her strategy? Join up with Russell. He called it a "coattail strategy." What's wrong with that?)
Nevertheless, little doubt Russell "played" the better game until final jury. He just didn't calibrate the consequences of his actions.
(And two other obvious problems - he double-crossed Brett, who certainly reminded the rest of the jury that they too had gotten the same treatment; and b.) everyone already knew Russell was a millionaire; like they were gonna reward him AGAIN?! )
Ol Russ was the delusional one, in the end.
[Meanwhile, CBS has confirmed that the next edition of "Survivor" - heroes vs. villains - will indeed air after this one; "The Live Feed" has this. And what better villain to appear in h vs. v than Russell? It's already been taped - in Samoa. Will air Feb. 11. Just around the corner.]
Tags: natalie white, russell hantz, survivor, cbs
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New host for "Late Late Show:" A croc
For one night only - tonight being the night - Craig Ferguson is relinquishing "The Late Late Show" to Wavy the Crocodile....
Show is one thousand episides old.
Why Wavy?
(Ask not why Wavy, but why not?)
Tags: late late show with craig ferguson, cbs, wavy the crocodile
