How mom should handle tween's confession
DEAR AMY: My sweet 11-year-old son, who has started to hit puberty, confessed to me in a fit of tears that when I left him at home with an older sister while I went to the store, he "went crazy." He told me he drank a can of soda (restricted at our house) and then Googled pictures of naked girls on the Internet. He was distraught. He said he didn't know why he did it -- it was like some other person was inside him and he couldn't control it. I'm so proud of him for coming clean, but I wonder if I should be worried. My goal is to keep him coming to me. What should I do now?Mom
DEAR MOM: You sound like a very thoughtful mother. Your son wants to understand his own impulses, and he wants to keep your high esteem.
His actions fall within the normal range for a boy his age. Refresh your values and your rules, and tell him he will face lots of opportunities to make choices, and you want to help him. And, as he matures, he will be exposed to many temptations, and he should always listen to his inner voice.
Your ongoing attitude toward him should be that you will always be in his corner, prepared to talk about anything -- even if it is difficult.
DEAR AMY: I haven't seen my lover from college for more than 40 years. We had an intimate relationship for several months, until she moved away. I have been thinking of her and wondering if I should contact her to catch up on where we have taken our lives. Rekindling our romance is the furthest thing from my mind. Through the Internet, I know she is happily married with a family, mirroring my own situation. Should I see her again?Just Wondering
DEAR WONDERING: When faced with such a potentially highly charged personal dilemma, I think it's best for a happily married man to ask his wife for her opinion.