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ANIMAL HOUSE: Finding the ideal dog groomer

Denise Flaim | Animal House

April 17, 2008

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Is there life after "Queer Eye"? For Jai Rodriquez, there is.

No longer coaching clueless straight guys, Rodriquez turns his attention to tousled pooches in a new reality show, "Groomer Has It," which debuted Saturday at 9 p.m. On the Animal Planet show, a dozen groomers attempt such Herculean feats as identifying a dog's breed while blindfolded to grooming farm animals. (Do Bantam hens care about "product"?)

The winner takes home the vaunted title of Groomer of the Year, and a prize package worth $125,000, which is a whole lotta creme rinse.

But what about the rest of us who just want our Lhasa apsos not to resemble miniature Cousin Itts?

Denise Flaim Bio | E-mail | Recent columns

Barbara Bird of Tucson, Ariz., a groomer for 38 years and a frequent lecturer on the subject, says a good groomer is a find - and a keeper.

"Looking for a groomer is like looking for a baby-sitter and hairdresser in the same person - not everybody who's a great technician is patient and loving, and likewise, not everybody who likes animals has any styling skills," she warns.

The ideal groomer has that indefinable "way with animals" - she exudes a quiet confidence that animals defer to. And on the practical side, she has the experience to safely use sharp cutting tools on moving and sometimes reluctant animals, and has an eye for creating pleasing, appropriate cuts.

If you are looking for a new groomer - or rethinking your current one - here are some questions to ponder:

Is the groomer certified? Three

groups offer national certification: International Professional Groomers (ipgcmg.org), the National Dog Groomers Association (nationaldoggroomers .com) and the International Foundation of Canine Cosmetologists (petstylist.com/ISCC /ISCCMain.htm).

Can the groomer "do" your

breed? You don't expect your Bichon to emerge from the grooming shop ready to hit the Best in Show ring. "But if you have a purebred, you want it to look like its breed," Bird says.

This is an advantage to national certification: "It means the groomer knows what a breed's visual qualities are and how to manifest them," she explains. "So your Schnauzer won't look like a cocker spaniel with a hula skirt."

Similarly, if you have a long-haired mix or crossbreed like a Labradoodle, you want a groomer with an eye for selecting a flattering cut for your "original."

Can you have a tour?

Good groomers are understandably proud of their shops. If yours does not have an open-door policy - why not?

How are the animals

dried? Everyone has

heard horror stories about dogs burned in a heated cage dryers from which they could not escape.

Bird cautions that tools are only as good as those who use them. Provided they are in a room that is attended at all times, heated cage dryers may have a place in a groomer's regimen.

But so should a range of drying equipment, including fans, ambient-air dryers that attach to the front of crates, forced-air dryers, which use pressure rather than air heat, and conventional handheld blowers. The more options, the better.

Is the groomer dog-wise? Grooming isn't just about sculpting fur. A good groomer has a sensitivity to your dog's stress level.

Indeed, knowing when a dog has reached the end of his rope can sometimes mean the difference between life and death. Bird recounts the story of an adult boxer at another shop who got so stressed "he blew a fuse," and died on the grooming table.

This doesn't mean groomers will never resort to muzzling a potential biter. "Sometimes, muzzling neutralizes the issue," Bird notes. Again, because each dog is an individual, a good groomer must size up the situation.

Is the groomer honest? If the

groomer says, "She was fine," but your Maine coon returns home quasi-catatonic, there is some cognitive dissonance going on. A good groomer, Bird advises, "is willing to say, 'We had some difficulty today.'"

Is it a high-volume shop? "If the

place does fewer dogs, you're going to pay more, but you're probably going to get more individual attention," Bird says. "The high-volume, low-price places with a lot of turnover of staff and a hidden back room - that's where you need to be concerned."

That said, Bird reminds us that "good groomers can be found in all kinds of establishments" - working for vets, making house calls or in big chain pet stores.

The trick is finding them. And in that, as in most everything in life, your gut is usually your best guide.