Pet Care Is a Two-Way Street

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We could all use a Chet.

I was thinking this recently as I went through an e-mail in- box filled with your questions. Amid the evergreens - "How do I tame a feral cat?" "Where can I find a reputable dog breeder?" - there are always a bunch of medical questions.

Of course, the only person truly qualified to dispense medical advice about your animal is your vet. But in many of those desperate e-mails, the vet has been consulted, and the owner remains dissatisfied.

While I have some very good veterinarians with whom I share your questions for input, I can trump whatever they are going to say with the best advice of all:

Denise Flaim Denise Flaim Bio | E-mail | Recent columns

If you are unhappy with your vet and the advice he gives, find another.

Enter Chet the vet. He practices in Maryland, and I have never met him, except through an e-mail from Lynn, a dog-show friend and long-time breeder, on the subject of how to find a good vet.

Most of her criteria are practical: A good vet should stay current with professional literature and regularly attend symposia and lectures. ("If your vet reads Veterinary Economics before he reads the Journal of the American Veterinary Medical Association, I'd worry," she deadpanned.) A good vet should have access to the latest technology. And he should not only know when he has reached the end of his expertise, but what specialist to refer you to when he does. "When [my dog] Chili's femur was broken in 13 places," Lynn recalled, "Chet called in a superb orthopedic surgeon who not only made her whole, but made her dead sound again." (In that breeder- speak context, by the way, dead is a very good thing.)

To Lynn's list, I'd add rapport. Knowledge is not omniscience, and confidence is not the same as imperiousness. You need to be able to talk to your vet, and she should know how to listen. And because part of being a healer is empowering those you help, she should be willing to help light the way.

"If you're really lucky, you'll find someone like Chet, who turns every visit into a seminar - sometimes on other people's dogs, if he has seen a particularly interesting problem or successful case - but I always get a full, nonpatronizing explanation of what's wrong, how we're going to fix it, and why," Lynn wrote. "I also hear if he's not sure what's going on, and how he's going to figure it out. He teaches the staff the same way - and I have the utmost confidence in each of the people who works there."

But the more I reread Lynn's e-mail, the more I realize that Chet is only half the equation. In life, you get what you give, and your role as your animal's caretaker is no different. For every white- coated egomaniac out there are owners whose disinterest in the details of their animal's care is palatable. Do you know what vaccines your cat is getting - do you even ask? Do you cut your vet's explanation of the treatment plan short by saying, "Whatever you decide is fine"? Do you ask wanly about a new treatment option you heard about in passing without having actually done the research to discuss it intelligently? If your vet took the trouble to educate you, would it be a waste of time?

Some vets aren't open to new ideas or approaches, and that's unfortunate. But in many cases, that resistance is at least understandable: How many owners have administered toxic doses of the latest herbal remedy because they didn't read up on it? How many demanded that a vet pull out all the stops, then skipped out on the bill because that was too much money for "just a dog"?

Although it has yet to be proven in a double-blind study, there is a direct correlation between the openness of a veterinarian's mind and an owner's willingness to take responsibility for her animal's care.

"If you think I'm a little in love with my vet, you're right," Lynn admitted. "He has been a literal lifesaver over the 20-plus years I've used him - and when, at last, a life was beyond saving, I get a comforting hug and an individual sympathy note in his own hand. I hope you're fortunate enough to find someone as good."

I'd venture that Chet would say the same.

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