THE SHOW "Conspiracy Theory With Jesse Ventura"

WHEN | WHERE Wednesday night at 10 on TruTV

REASON TO WATCH The Bod Squad

WHAT IT'S ABOUT Think "Unsolved Mysteries," although Ventura's more activist than Robert Stack. He leads a group of investigative producers - the Bod Squad (my name for 'em) - to get at the "real" story behind all those conspiracies out there.

Tonight, the former wrestler and Minnesota governor body slams HAARP - High Frequency Active Auroral Research Program - a Navy facility in Alaska that studies the ionosphere. Will the Bod Squad prove this facility is actually a death ray?

MY SAY This show is a one-hour "Saturday Night Live" skit - if only "SNL" were this good. When one of The Body's reporters fails to get a HAARP rep to admit that the facility causes earthquakes, mass psychosis or weather changes, he explains that " the HAARP spokesman is in denial."

During an editorial meeting, another producer tells Ventura he has compelling evidence that HAARP may have caused the Indonesian tsunamis. Everyone agrees HAARP probably didn't do this on purpose, thankfully: "What are they going to do?" snorts Ventura. "Fess up? 'Oops, we made a mistake.' "

Ventura helicopters deep into the Alaskan bush, where he tells viewers HAARP is hidden far from prying eyes. (Well, not quite - it's actually right off a major interstate.) The guard won't let Ventura in, so The Body concludes: "An operation run by the Navy doesn't shut out a former Navy SEAL. They've got something to hide."

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BOTTOM LINE Hilarious. Oh wait, it's not supposed to be. Never mind.

GRADE D+