THE SHOW "Killer Women"
WHEN | WHERE Series premiere Tuesday night at 10 on ABC/7
WHAT IT'S ABOUT The elite cadre of female Texas Rangers is a tough band of hombrettes who can sling their booze and their sidearms with the baddest of their male counterparts. They are . . . killer women! In fact, they are so elite, there is only one of them: Molly Parker (Tricia Helfer), who sets aside her personal life (daughter, abusive ex) to go after the worst of the worst, who can, in fact, be killer women, too. Tuesday's pilot is a case in point: A female San Antonio assistant district attorney is killed at the altar by an assailant wearing stilettos and a tight red little nothing. Did she kill the ADA in a pique of jealousy? Molly will get to the bottom of it.
MY SAY With a title like "Killer Women," this has either got to be high camp -- a silly send-up of the oldest formula on the books -- or just plain bad. It's not the former, so now you know. "Killer Women" is hackwork of the first order from producers and actors who know better -- most notably showrunner Sofia Vergara, who doesn't star in her first English-language production. Maybe she's now officially stretched too thin. With commitments to "Modern Family," her designer lines and other TV productions, how can she be expected to pay attention to details as specific (or important) as "is this good or is this laughable"? It's a shame, because most of the basics are in place, especially Helfer who is as stunning a screen presence as ever and still looking for one role -- any role -- to match Cylon Number Six from her "Battlestar Galactica" days. She's good, and so is the rest of the cast including Marc Blucas ("Necessary Roughness"), who plays a DEA agent. It's the ersatz '70s procedural they're in that's not.
BOTTOM LINE The worst new show of 2014 can take solace that there are still 358 days left for another one to exceed it.