'Brooklyn 11223,' a 'Jersey' wannabe

Maria, Joey Lynn, Valona in "Brooklyn 11223" Episode

Maria, Joey Lynn, Valona in "Brooklyn 11223" Episode 101 . (Credit: Oxygen)

THE SHOW "Brooklyn 11223," Oxygen, 11 p.m. Monday

REASON TO WATCH Some prelaunch notoriety has given this unscripted show some juice.

WHAT IT'S ABOUT Welcome to Bay Ridge, Brooklyn, where blood is thicker 'n water, and the tough, iconic who-you-talkin'-to-you-talkin'-to-me accent is apparently even thicker. A group of young women has split into warring "crews" -- Joey Lynn's and Christie's. Christie is nursing an old wound (she claims Joey Lynn slept with her boyfriend). Joey Lynn is indignant ("I did not sleep with that . . ." The battle of words is on. (And no, Tony Manero does not make a cameo.) The show already has notoriety because Bay Ridge Councilman Vinnie Gentile has led protests and written editorials saying its "caricatures . . . cement the basest bigotries."

MY SAY Apparently tired of essentially being a one-show network ("Bad Girls Club") Oxygen is about to go ahead and launch another one. The difference between both is negligible. There's a lot of screaming and swearing, and while watching -- not that you should -- try to picture some frazzled incompetent at an edit console frantically pressing the beep button. His or her timing is badly off -- so badly that only two letters of each four-letter word are excised. But there's a monumental issue at stake here. Did or did not Joey Lynn sleep with whathisname? And if she did, then how dare she, the ----. We'd all better be prepared to watch a six-episode reality show to find out why -- and many more episodes if this is a hit.

Yeah, "Brooklyn 11223" is awful, and awful not because it's inauthentic -- it isn't necessarily to those being portrayed here -- but because it's hugely phony. There is a difference. Reality TV has taught would-be stars to act out: Be certain to cuss because that confers cred, and be really obnoxious because the camera favors the obnoxious over the meek, and essentially make complete -- -- of yourselves because ratings will be astronomical. And, of course, that's exactly what always happens.

BOTTOM LINE The good people of Bay Ridge will laugh their ---- off as they watch this. Then wince. Then they'll get mad. They should.

GRADE D

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