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45° Good Morning

She wants proof her boyfriend is honest

DEAR AMY: I have been in a relationship with this guy for three years, and I am always debating if he is lying to me. He cheated on me with his "ex" twice (no, sorry -- three times), and I still keep taking him back. I always want to give this guy the benefit of the doubt because when we are together we are the best of friends. Recently he has been saying that he wants to marry me and he is building a house for us, but I have never seen anything in the ways of building plans, carpet samples or even paint chips. I always ask him to prove things to me. I tell him he has tarnished my trust in him, and if he would just prove something to me we can move on. Much to my dismay, he has not proved a thing to me. What do you think I should do?

-- Crazy and Confused

DEAR CONFUSED: You asked this guy to prove something to you, and he has. He has proved that he is a consistent liar and a cheat. What more proof do you require? At some point, a person's unwillingness to believe a clear and obvious proof starts making that person look pretty foolish.

You've already passed that point. It's time for you to move on, and let the (paint) chips fall where they may.

DEAR AMY: This is regarding the letter from "Mother" who complained that her "beautiful, professional daughter" who, when speaking, "uses the word 'like' about every fifth word." Toastmasters International is a renowned, worldwide organization that trains people to become good public speakers. During a novice speaker's first speech, a fellow Toastmaster is assigned to count the number of "ums" and "you know's" uttered. The speaker is almost always shocked to hear how many times they've interjected those nonsensical words into their delivery.

-- Speaker

DEAR SPEAKER: I have been called on my use of "you know." And now I know.

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