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My Turn: Finding the man of my dreams at 64

Harriet and Lou Monaco Jr. at Grand Central

Harriet and Lou Monaco Jr. at Grand Central Station, where they were married on May 28, 2016. The couple met through an online dating site. Credit: Rachel Ekus-Luhrs

At 64, I had given up on finding love again; I decided it just wasn’t in the cards for me, I was too picky, too short, and too vain, and too, well you get the idea.

I had been on a number of dating sites for way too long and met guys who were looking for either arm candy, a roll in the sack or someone to take care of them. I didn’t want any of that. I wanted someone down to earth, who wanted a relationship, someone I could share anything with forever or what was left of forever for me.

The winter was here and once again I found myself alone in my apartment with my cat, Jack, on my lap watching another reality show and thinking, “Really, is this what I want?” Of course, the answer was “no.”

A friend met someone on a fairly new dating site called for those of us in the over 50-single crowd. So, I decided, why not, I have nothing to lose. I signed up for three months. At the beginning, I was a little disappointed in what I was seeing. The decent-looking men in my age range seemed to be interested in much younger women. So, instead of waiting for someone to contact me, I decided to reach out to whom “I” was interested — and a wonderful thing happened.

I reached out to a man named Lou who was nice looking, with beautiful sky blue eyes, was in great shape, worked full-time and was family-oriented like me. After emailing back and forth and few misunderstandings regarding meeting up, we met at a local tavern on March 9, 2015.

I got out of my car and liked what I saw. He looked even better in person than on his profile. There was an immediate chemistry on both our parts. We sat for an hour and got to know each other and upon leaving, I asked for a hug, which he reluctantly returned. I would find out later that he found it strange that I would ask a total stranger for a hug, especially someone in dirty work clothes.

We dated every weekend from then on and agreed that the stars were aligned, and we were supposed to meet and be together. One evening before we were going out to visit family, Lou got down on one knee and proposed. It was Nov. 14, 2015. We were married on May 28 this year in Grand Central Station in Manhattan.

So, at the age of 64, I found my dream man. Now I’m acting like I’m a young girl again and loving every minute of it.

LATER-IN-LIFE ROMANCE? Have you finally met the person of your dreams? Were you widowed, divorced, never married and looking for someone to share life with, even if you were set in your ways? Did you think it might never happen? Where did you find your someone to love? Are you dating exclusively but don’t want to live together? Or do you live together and have no intention of marrying? Do you use the terms “boyfriend” or “girlfriend,” or are there better pet names when you’re older? What’s the upside of a late-in-life romance? Do you split the bills equally? What do you have in common? What’s the best thing about having a companion, married or not? Tell us your story about finding someone later in life for possible publication. Email your essay to, or write to Act 2 Editor, Newsday Newsroom, 235 Pinelawn Rd., Melville, NY 11747. Include your name, address and phone numbers. Send pictures if available.


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