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25% of New Yorkers wouldn't date someone in a different boro: Survey

Laura and Nelson Fernandez had a nearly 2-hour

Laura and Nelson Fernandez had a nearly 2-hour commute between apartments when they started dating. Credit: Laura and Nelson Fernandez had a nearly 2-hour commute between apartments when they started dating.

Would you leave your borough for love? A quarter of New Yorkers say no.

According to a new survey from, 25% of city-dwellers said they wouldn't consider dating someone who lived in a different borough.

The results split evenly between men and women - both at exactly 25% -- but at 28%, Manhattan nabbed the highest percentage of residents who wouldn't date someone from another borough. Queens came in lowest at 23%.

Shamir A. Khan, a psychologist who treats couples, said the city's singles may not be willing to venture to other borough for many reasons, including convenience, subway travel time, dating where you work, and stereotypes about people who live in other borough.

"NYC is a tough place for singles to find a solid connection," Khan said. It's possible "Manhattanites would have certain stereotypes about someone living in Staten Island, possibly, the other way around too," he said. But "people need to remain flexible and open and not stereotype or exclude based on borough."

Khan added tha couples living in different boroughs should "learn to agree on mangaing expectations" and "develop a routine so that one person isn't always feeling like they're the one traveling."

Still, some New Yorkers said dating people in different boroughs can be too much to handle.

"I've done it, and I hated it," said Brian Roces, 43, who lives on the Lowers East Side. "I never dated anyone else who was geographically undesirable after her, I only dated girls in Manhattan," said Roces, who is now married (to someone who lived in Manhattan when they met).

Nelson and Laura Fernandez, however, overcame the inter-borough gulf.

The couple met in the early 1990s at Baruch College, when Nelson lived in Flushing and Laura lived in Bensonhurst. The commute between their apartments - sometimes more than two hours - wasn't easy, Nelson said, but they made it work.

"The hardest part was always that, in the back of your mind, you were always thinking about how late it would be when you got home," said Nelson, 41.

But five years later, and many long nights on the subway and driving in the car, the couple married.

"There were times when it was a painful, especially with the trains being what they were back then," he said. "But it was worth it."

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