High society is all aglow over Billy Joel’s New Year’s Eve concert at the NYCB Live’s Nassau Coliseum. The Social Register across the breadth and depth of Long Island will be there. Representing the South Shore will be distinguished Hugh Litt. The grapevine has it that philanthropist Glenn Kove is escorting heiress Lynne Brook. Lending a splash of international flavor will be the German ambassador, Herr Ricks, along with Mexican diplomat Juan Taww.
Although she has kept a low profile of late, the scandalous Ros Lynn may attend. Of course, youth must be served, and so debutante Minnie Olah has indicated she will come with (beau?) Wally Stream. At the other end of the demographic spectrum, everyone’s favorite grand mum, old Beth Paige, is determined to attend, even if it means being wheeled in by nephews Karl Place and Brent Woode.
It is certain to be an evening for the history books for pedagogical expert Jerry Coe, providing he can stop bragging about his school district long enough to enjoy the music! And if she can take an evening out from acquiring more office parks, real estate magnate Hope Hogg may drop in with newspaperman Mel Vill and his golfing buddy, Cy Ossit. And if things slow down, famed storyteller Ron Konkamah can be counted on to relate an Indian legend.
Wes Hampton, oft overlooked sibling of the East End clan, is whispered to be making plans. Not to be outdone, Cal Verton will make a rare appearance. Nestled quaintly on the Sound, Poor Jeff has scoured the necessary pennies and dimes from under his couch cushions to make it, and country singers Honey Tinn and Wynn Dyanch might come on horseback. North Fork vineyard proprietor Matty Tuck will make sure no one overindulges. And, say! There in the corner, looking a trifle concerned about her social standing, is none other than the utterly delightful Shirley Mastic!
So make merry, Long Island, by welcoming the new year with your native son. And Billy, you may be right, you don’t need to be a big shot, or have an uptown girl on your arm, to enjoy yourself.
Reader Todd Alexander Postol lives in Port Jefferson.