If there were a Bottom Five list of things I’d like to be doing on Christmas Eve, writing a Bottom Five list would be on it. There are plenty of bells to jingle and eggs to nig before I fly off to Wisconsin for the game against the Packers.
But I’ve done this all season long and there seems to be little sense in stopping with two weeks left. So here are the Bottom Five Things to Look For in Sunday’s game in Green Bay.
As you know, there are plenty of outlets that give you the top few things you should be looking for in the game. Here, though, we go straight to the bottom of the list –yes, I’ve checked the list twice! – and report on the happenings that might not be drawing headlines or attention.
5. Although he has been ruled “out” for the game and hasn’t even been on the team’s roster for three seasons, Brett Favre starts at quarterback for the Packers. The league doesn’t bat an eye over the blatant misuse of the injury report or the 53-man roster.
4. Matt Dodge kicks his first punt so far out of bounds it lands in Chicago, where Devin Hester returns it for a touchdown.
3. Despite temperatures in the teens, Tom Coughlin coaches the game in short sleeves because Dave Tollefson’s mom stole all of his sweatshirts and jackets to toughen him up. “Hats and gloves are signs of weakness,” Tollefson’s mom yells. “I didn’t fly here from California to see you bundled up.”
2. Flush with power, Eli Manning calls a team meeting to tell the team that he’ll be calling a team meeting on Sunday to discuss future team meetings that he will call. Applause levels at these meetings quickly dwindle.
1. Rex Ryan has become a devout reader of this feature, thinking that "The Bottom Five" might refer to toes and not things to look for in football games. Sorry, Rex.