Well, there was certainly a lot of non-football stuff to talk about this week. Between the etiquette of when and whom to boo, the significance of passionate pep talks, and, yes, the traffic patterns of Shawn Andrews’ bowels, it was hard to keep focused on the idea that the Giants are playing a very important game on Sunday against the Redskins.
Consider this: They haven’t even played a game this week and they already lost ground to the Eagles in the division race!
But this is certainly our kind of week, a time to poke fun at any number of things going on. Maybe this week the Bottom Five Things to Look For will actually become the Top Five? Nah. We like to stick it to the Man, stay underground and alternative.
So while you can shop around to any number of websites looking for the Top Five keys to this game, ranging from stopping Donovan McNabb to not allowing big passes to figuring out how to keep Brian Orakpo off Eli Manning, we’ll stick to our Bottom Five here at the end of the list:
5. Halftime is spent in awkward silence as players just look silently at one another, wondering if anyone has anything to say. They don’t. Although when Travis Beckum has to clear his throat, all heads quickly turn towards him in eager anticipation. He gives an apologetic shrug.
4. Instead of answering questions from the media after the game, Antrel Rolle simply reads aloud from an extensive list he has jotted down of people you should not boo: “… 14. Doctors coming out of surgery. 15. A mailman delivering a package. 16. The guy who cooks the pizza when he reaches into that hot oven, because he can get burned really bad and I've seen it happen. 17. Nuns …”
3. It turns out that Justin Tuck and Osi Umenyiora weren’t the only one’s to address the team at halftime last week. Laid-back Steve Smith says he, too, tore into the soul of the team. What did he say? “Yeah, man, we’ll probably lose this game. I don’t know. It sucks.” Run through a wall for that guy.
2. “ … 23. FIFA World Cup organizers. 24. Those greeters at WalMart, unless they’re really obnoxiously happy then it’s OK. 25. Gas station attendants. 26. Crossing guards. 27. LeBron James. 28. Roofers …”
1. In a quick pregame chat, McNabb siddles up to Rolle and whispers: “Brother, you don’t know what booing is.”