This is it, guys. It’s your day. The day no one can harangue you for staring intently at the gridiron ballet taking place before your eyes. The day where puerile humor is not only tolerated, it’s encouraged. The day dedicated to the five major food groups: Wings, Pizza, Beer, Chips, and Deep Fried Whatever.
So we got the Saint and the Colts. You know the breakdowns, you know the players and you know what to expect.
So it’s gonna be a high-scoring game, a’ight? Peyton Manning, the patron saint of crazy obsessive QBs who throw hard (yes, there’s such a thing) meets up against Drew Brees, the insanely likeable good ole boy who’s spent the season winning fantasy league titles for football geeks far and wide.
But maybe not. The Colt defense has been way stingy of late. We know this. It’s going to be fun to see how the Nawleans Saints manage it. Jets fans got to see the iron hammer fall down hard on them in the second half of their game. Then there was the game against Ravens, which I will summarize thusly: Ouch.
The Saints are AMERICA’S team. Ok, not really. The Saints are New Orleans’ team. At least give the city the dignity of staying off the bandwagon, or at least don't appropriate them as your own. That said, if Chad Ochocinco’s twitter is to be believed, Florida is awash in black and gold. And I don’t think I wanna live in a world where Ochocinco’s twitter can’t be trusted. So: home field advantage goes to them. Like a lot. Plus, they got the dog on their side.
The Colts have math on their side. They’re the 4.5 point favorite.
And all the other stuff is going on, too. Tebow’s ad, commercials (oooooh, the commercials), the food coma. Also: Apparently Ron Swoboda came up with Who Dat? Take that, Tug McGraw! It's not a post season without random rallying cheers.
Laura Albanese here to take you through it. A special nod to my bro-in-law Tony for the assist during the game. He doesn’t know it yet, but he’ll be doing the color commentary. It’s the Super Bowl people! It’s a time to sit next to your family, pump your blood full of saturated fat, and grunt angrily at the HDTV.
Kickoff coming up soon!
Who Dat? Dem Super Bowl Champion Saints. Wow. The Saints dominated and the French quarter is going absolutely nuts right now. That's all she wrote. Peace! - LA
SAINTS WIN, 31-17.
0:44 - Incomplete pass, right through Wayne's hands. The Saints are gonna take this. The over/under is at 53. Lotsa people gonna be outta money thanks to Reggie Wayne.
2:06 - Manning with the throw to Collie at the 30. Two-minute warning. They're not recovering from this. Brees has 32 completions in the game. MVP, yeah? Pass interference called on the Colts and they get backed up to the 13. Addai takes it to within a few feet of the goal line.
SAINTS LEAD, 31-17
3:24 - Manning to outside receiver and the Saints blitz...PICKED OFF by Tracy Porter. He takes it all the way for 78 yards. Touchdown and the extra point is good. Guess shaving the SuperDome on his head provided the extra mojo.
SAINTS LEAD, 24-17
Two point conversion play is being challanged. Looked like Moore had posession at one point and twists into the endzone...They're giving it to him. That could be the game. (Bro-in-law: "That play at the 30. That was it." Indeed, that onside kick looks like it might live in infamy.)
SAINTS LEAD, 22-17
5:42 - Brees to Shockey in the corner for his third career postseason TD catch. They're going for two. It's bobbled in the endzone. Almost. Looks like he might've had it before it was kicked away, but it's called incomplete.
7:44 - Brees with a lovely throw to Colston for a gain of eight and a first down. It's a six yard gain and the Saints are at 2nd and four. They're on the the 14. Thomas with the catch at the five. First and goal.
10:44 - Manning deep to Collie, but Vilma knocks it down. It's 4th and 11 and Stover is back for the 51-yard FG. It's wide left. Great field position as the Saints take over at the 41.
13:09 - Colts going for it at fourth and two. Looked like they were going to try to draw them offsides but hike it with a second left on the clock. First down.
Inspired by Lady, the prognosticating Glen Cove dog who has picked the correct Super Bowl champion for the las six years, I asked the dog, Newman. He too said Saints. Kibble for thought.
2:00 - Anyone else just see Jeremy Shockey take an (intentional) elbow to the face?
COLTS LEAD, 17-16
2:11 - Hartley making a name for himself. 47-yard FG, becoming the first kicker to make three 40+ yard FGs in a Super Bowl. He's money.
4:31 - Brees to Henderson at the 31. You kinda get the feeling that the scoring is going to pick up, huh?
COLTS LEAD, 17-13
6:46 - Completion to Dallas at the seven. Manning to Addai, right down their throats. He breaks a tackle at the goal line. Touchdown. Excellent run. Extra point is good.
7:55 - Inconceivable (I don't think that means what you think it means) throw from Manning to Dallas Clark over four Saints defensemen for almost 30 yards and a first down. Indy's at the 15. It's 3rd and five.
Commercial Break! Ok. I don't wanna cause any riots, but Denny's is offering free grand slams Tuesday from 6 a.m. to 10 a.m. That. Is. Awesome.
SAINTS LEAD, 13-10
11:44 - Saints with the screen pass to Thomas. Colts caught o ntheir heels. Thomas with the 19-yard run(ish?). Extra point is good. Saw that one coming.
11:55 - Thomas runs inside for a new set of downs and a pickup of eight. They're at the 16.
13:34 - Two catches by Henderson for the Saints first down. (Bro-in-law: "Peyton hasn't touched the ball for a quarter and a half").
14:59 - Saints with the onside kick and Hank Baskett (I think?) got it..maybe? It's a scrum for the ball...looks like Saints got it. That. Is. Gutsy. They get it at the 40-something. "They were not playing pattycake practicing for this game" - Phil Simms.
HALFTIME: Taking bets on what The Who is going to sing. (Aside: The Who! Yes!). Extra points for Pinball Wizard and Behind Blue Eyes.
Ok...that was highly entertaining. Mad points for whoever dusted off Pete Townshend. And Daltry's still got it. In case anyone's curious, the medley set list: Pinball Wizard; Baba O'Riley; Who Are You?; See Me, Feel Me; Won't Get Fooled Again.
COLTS LEAD, 10-6
0:20 - Brees to Henderson. One timeout left and things are getting tense.Ends up with a 44 yard FG attempt. Hartley is good again. That was big 'un. Told y'all it could be low-scoring.
0:46 - Saints return the favor. Four quick downs for the Colts. Saints have it at the 46.
1:49 - They run the ball? WHY? Jennings goes outside and he is blasted at the goal line. Was that Gary Brackett who stopped him? Looked like Brackett.
Commercial Break! I could have lived my whole life without seeing Punxsutawney Polamalu.
2:00 - Bell going for the run and he falls for a loss of half a yard. That. Is. Huge. Fourth and goal. Do you go? I'd go.
2:54 - False start for the Saints. Big loss for Nawleans. Thomas with the run and he's down to the one. Two minute warning and the Saints are going to wait on it. Peyton's only had the ball three times this quarter.
5:26 - Brees to Moore. The DB pretty much disappeared on that play. It's a 21-yard catch and they're on the 23. Seven-yard loss on the next play, though. Brees to Colston with the seam pattern and he's wide open. He breaks the tackle and ends up at the three.
Commercial Break! Bro-in-law: "Finally! Dove for men!" We're gonna say that was a joke.
9:18 - Manning to Addai for the quick first down. He has the bro-in-law's vote for first half MVP. Also, the rest of the viewing public's. Still, Colts find themselves at 3rd and four. Peyton throws a BULLET to Garcon, who's running the slant. Right through his hands as the Saints blitz. That was a huge drop. Colts punt.
Commercial Break! Super Bowl ads make strange bedfellows. Leno, Letterman and Oprah together. Also: Two pantless commercials in a row. Not I trend I can get behind (pardon the pun). Brett Favre retirement commercial. HA! Apropos, that.
COLTS LEAD, 10-3
10:01 - Freeney (who bro-in-law informs me is a Mets fan) just sacked Brees. Garrett Hartley going for the 46-yarder and it's good.
13:01 - Brees to Pierre Thomas, who breaks two tackles to within a yard of a first down. He gets it on the next play, though. They're at the 39. Brees pass to Colston is good for about 10, skittering out of the way of Freeney.
COLTS LEAD, 10-0
0:36 - I'll clean this up for y'all: Tie for the longest TD drive in Super Bowl history at 96 yards, capped off by a 19-yard TD pass to Pierre Garcon past the double coverage. The real star, though, is Addai. The Saints were having fits trying to stop his running game, including a 26-yard gain up the middle at 3rd and one to put the Colts in position. Addai was responsible for all three first downs in the drive. Kick is good.
5:28 - Marques Colston drops a giftwrapped throw from Brees. Freeney's look good desite the ankle. Saints punt. It's a beauty - 46-yards, just inside the five.
7:17 - Ball dropped on the kickoff, but it hits the ground. Saints have possession around the 30. Brees to Bush for the Saints' first down of the game. They'e at the 48.
Commercial break! Aw, Betty White is always funny. And I feel like that Tebow ad was probably more low-key than it could have been. Wonder what the reaction will be....Boost Mobile and the '85 Bears in wheelchairs...mentally scarred (Brother-in-law: "This is GREAT.")
COLTS LEAD, 3-0
7:28 - The second coming of George Blanda, Matt Stover with the 38-yard field goal. (Manning's throw to Garcon on 3rd and five was incomplete.) Manning with six throws on the drive.
13:22 - Saints fail to advance far in the opening drive. T.J. Rushing is taken down at the Indy 27. Manning with a big toss to Dallas Clark for 15 and a first down. Excellent pressure from the Saints D and the Colts are wisely staying away from the running game. Manning is going with the short tosses - mostly to Clark. Big toss to Austin Collie for a first down with about nine minutes left.
Saints win the coin toss. Kickoff in a few.