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How to be part of the invite-only Hamptons crowd

Social Life Magazine's publisher and president Justin Mitchell,

Social Life Magazine's publisher and president Justin Mitchell, left, Sara Canning of "The Vampire Diaries," editor-in-chief of Social Life Magazine Devorah Rose and "90210's" Matt Lanter attend the Social Life Magazine Party in Water Mill. (May 29, 2010) Photo Credit: Newsday / Gina Tomitz

We all know the Hamptons is the home of luxury, style and wealth. It’s also the premiere setting for some of the biggest parties of the summer. But it seems that only a select few are part of the invite-only crowd, which doesn’t seem fair, now does it?

So we’re here to help you score that coveted spot on the guest list.

We enlisted Justin Mitchell, publisher and president of Social Life magazine (seen here with Sara Canning of "The Vampire Diaries," Social Life editor-in-chief Devorah Rose and Matt Lanter of "90210"), who knows a thing or two about the Hamptons scene. His magazine often throws cocktail soirees with an elite guest list.

“It’s all about who you know,” Mitchell says. “It’s a very tight-knit community [here].” How does Social Life choose who gets the invite? “We have a committee,” Mitchell says. “It’s a science, it’s not easy to do. Sometimes it’s just impossible [to get invited].”

His tips?

Use your connections. Just like any job, network. Give out and get business cards. Even if you don’t think they will help in the future, at least you have it. You never know who can be a great contact for you when you need that exclusive invite. The person you just met may know someone who knows someone who knows someone.

Be a giver. The rich and famous love to attend charity events because they have a heart or at least pretend they do. Drop $50,000 and people will take notice and possibly invite you to other events. To put it bluntly, they want your money.

Get a title. Become a manager of Turtle Crossing or Georgica, work in public relations for Axe Lounge or Lily Pond, or become a publicist to the stars. “Have a career that gives you a level of credibility,” Mitchell advises. “It can help, but not guarantee.”

Get to work. If all else fails, get a job where you can rub shoulders with the elite. Work as a waiter at Bobby Vans or the register at Blue & Cream. It may not get you a personal invitation, but at least you’re in the same place as the in crowd.

Become a celebrity. “Become a movie star and hire a good publicist,” Mitchell jokes.

Here’s to dreaming.

Social Life Magazine's publisher and president Justin Mitchell, left, Sara Canning of "The Vampire Diaries," editor-in-chief of Social Life Magazine Devorah Rose and "90210's" Matt Lanter attend the Social Life Magazine Party in Water Mill. (May 29, 2010)

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