DEAR AMY: I'm almost 30, and I've been with my boyfriend since we were teens. We live together at my father's house. My boyfriend recently told me that he got another girl pregnant. He says he doesn't love her and doesn't want to be with her but that he does want to be there for the baby. I'm lost and confused. We've been trying to have a baby for about five years now. It broke my heart when he told me he was having a baby with another girl. I don't want to break up. I'm in love with him, but I don't want to be in a relationship where I'm not happy. Heartbroken
DEAR HEARTBROKEN: His actions indicate it's time for him to leave. When you two are separated you won't have to tolerate his infidelity, listen to his lies and (eventually) help raise his child. Your life will start fresh, and I hope you will take advantage of your fresh start by making brave choices to put yourself first, raise your standards and expect personal integrity and sexual fidelity in your partners. Bravely give him the boot.
DEAR AMY: My husband and I invited a couple out to dinner to a restaurant we all like. We hadn't socialized with them in quite some time, and I was really looking forward to catching up. When we were finalizing the plans for the evening, I received a text that our friends had invited another couple whom we have never met. Is it as rude as I think it is? Fuming
DEAR FUMING: I can imagine a situation in which friends might think it would be OK to ask to expand the party (e.g., they had friends pop in unexpectedly from out of town), but in general it is not acceptable to issue an invitation to a gathering where you are not the host.
If they wanted to include another couple, they should not have sent a text declaring their intentions but should have called you and verbally asked if you would object. Your friends didn't behave well.