Nassau, we have slogans for you

Nassau County Executive Bruce Blakeman is spending $5,000 in an effort to trademark a slogan extolling the glories of his domain: "Nassau County: Golden From Coast To Coast." It's a phrase Blakeman used last year in national ads promoting the county's attractions and is likely to pop up again in promotions of Nassau's 125th anniversary and the Cricket T20 World Cup next month.

The county probably doesn't need to shell out money to protect this banal slogan from being pirated, but if Blakeman has $5K to burn perhaps it would be better spent finding more appropriate words which capture this moment in time for Long Island's most western metropolis. In that sprit, we offer these suggestions:

Nassau County: Where taxation reaches new heights

Nassau County: We came here to get away from that

Nassau County: A Costco chicken in every pot, three cars in every garage

Nassau County: Keep calm and donate your guns

Nassau County: You just can't beat the traffic

Nassau County: Eroding from coast to coast

Nassau County: Where the signs are even bigger than the egos

Nassau County: Our militia is second to none 

Nassau County: Crows at my window, dogs at my door, no one can take these taxes anymore

Nassau County: Bet on us, though we might never get a casino

Nassau County: We don't need no stinkin' governor

Nassau County: No masks, no mandates, no transgender athletes

Nassau County: My driving is your problem

Nassau County: Our leaders go for the gold in grandstanding