Yankees signing Billy Crystal is absurd

Jim Baumbach

8:15 PM EDT, March 11, 2008

Billy Crystal strikes out in his first at-bat with the Yankees. Crystal led off the game as the designated hitter, facing Pittsburgh Pirates pitcher Paul Maholm. (AP Photo / March 13, 2008)

Look, we've never taken spring training games too seriously. Otherwise, we'd write about wins and losses and openly question why pitchers are allowed to do their running on the warning track during games.

But just because these are exhibitions doesn't give the Yankees -- and commissioner Bud Selig -- the license to turn the Yankees' camp into a bad joke for a few days.

Come on, seriously, Billy Crystal?

The Yankees announced Monday night they are signing Crystal to a one-day, minor-league contract with an invitation to major-league spring training. Seriously. He will practice with the Yankees Wednesday and play in their game against the Pirates Thursday afternoon in Tampa.

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It's a birthday gift of sorts -- Crystal turns 60 Friday and he will wear No. 60. In the news release, Crystal says, "I've been waiting 50 years for this call."

If Crystal really wanted to taste the life of a major-leaguer -- and that statement alone is rather humorous, considering how often he has been in the clubhouse and on the field over the past decade -- well, there are a number of less offensive ways to go about it.

Let him throw the ceremonial first pitch, sing the national anthem or, heck, take him on the chartered plane to a few cities. You can even have him do stand-up for the team behind closed doors before the game. Or better yet, the Yankees' Web site says their next fantasy camp begins Nov. 17.

But to sign this guy to a contract, to give him a real locker and to let him play in a game, even if it's an exhibition, is making a mockery out of what the players go through every day.

The Yankees players won't admit this is silly at best and offensive at worst because they know that by saying as much, they'll just make this a bigger story. It's best to just stay quiet and wait for Thursday's game in Tampa to be over with. The most you'll see is some eyes rolling.

The real question is, what happened to the Yankees? And what happened to George Steinbrenner? All The Boss cared about was winning, even in spring training, yet the team has turned Thursday's game into a show featuring an actor who turns 60 in a day and who last played baseball at Long Beach High School. At least when Garth Brooks suited up for the Mets in 2000, he was young enough to blend in and did it for charity.

What's next? Jerry Seinfeld playing for the Mets? Jack Nicholson in a Lakers uniform? Hillary Clinton playing for the Cubs, or, I mean, Yankees, or, no, the Cubs?

It's not as if the Yankees get anything out of this, either. The game already had to have been sold out, as all the games are at Legends Field. And they've never been in need of publicity.

And what does this say about Crystal's relationship with Joe Torre? Let's not forget that Torre left last year with bad feelings, so much so that he said he couldn't foresee returning to Yankee Stadium anytime soon. That was big news then, but somewhat forgotten now because he quickly moved on to the Dodgers. But surely Torre hasn't forgotten.

Days after refusing the .Yankees' offer, Torre went on the "Late Show with David Letterman" and joked that now he has to fight with the .Yankees for custody of Crystal.

Torre should have fought harder.