The lower level of this Bay Shore split-level has a...

The lower level of this Bay Shore split-level has a suite for a couple including a bedroom, large den, full bathroom and separate entrance through the garage. It is separated from the main living quarters upstairs. It is in a house that is currently on the market for $509,000. Credit: Handout

When Chris Muldoon and husband, John, downsized 14 years ago, they had her rheumatoid arthritis in mind when they chose a very small house in West Babylon. But several years later, with health issues mounting, they decided they wanted to live closer to their daughter and her family -- so close that the two families could help each other out. So the Muldoons extended their house, giving themselves one side and their daughter, son-in-law and two children the other side.

"The choices for parents as they age are -- move into an apartment, where you don't have to take care of the landscaping, go into a nursing home or live with the children," says Chris Muldoon. "If you can accommodate both families with enough space, it's a benefit. It's much better than in the old days with Grandma living in the back room."

Real estate agents have noticed a growing trend of families looking for similar setups, and they are noting this in ads touting, "Room for Mom," "Special Home Built With Family in Mind," and "Large Master Suite Fully Designed for Mom."

"Many people just don't have the money to put their parents into assisted living," says Francesca Morrocu Blass, an associate broker with Daniel Gale Sotheby's International Realty of Port Washington. "Not only that, but they want them to be with the grandkids, and they feel that having them nearby is a better environment for the parents."

But buyers must be careful that houses come with all necessary permits and certificates of occupancy.

Janet Rinker, supervisor for Code Enforcement in the Town of Huntington, suggests buyers ask if sellers have legal permits for a second kitchen or a finished basement. But, she stresses, every town on Long Island has its own rules on additions and home improvements, and buyers should check with the town. Some towns, though not Huntington, have special permits for mother-daughter arrangements.

Many seek multilevel homes with space for the parents on the ground floor. High-ranches work best because you have the downstairs with a walkout basement, says Millie Thomas of Landmark Realty of Long Island in Wading River.

For the Muldoons, the combined living arrangement has worked out well. Now they are selling the house.

"Having someone in the house to help with doctor visits and trips to the emergency room is comforting," Chris Muldoon says. "And the grandparents can help with the grandchildren, too."

The best feature about her house is that it's on one floor, Muldoon says. The Muldoons would like a living area that's a little smaller, now that they are spending winters in Florida.

"We have two laundry rooms and two kitchens, which is very important for two women," she says, "and a nice, strong door in between the two sections."


Port Washington, $779,000


Bay Shore, $499,000


Wading River, $699,000


West Babylon, $484,500


Brentwood, $269,000


Renovation is another option

For many, buying a new home to accommodate parents is too costly and the thought of moving overwhelming.

Another option is to retrofit an existing home.

"Seniors on Long Island were like pioneers when they came here 50, 60 years ago," says Sandi Gerson, an associate broker and seniors real estate specialist with Century 21 American Homes in Franklin Square. "Many are attached to their neighborhoods and don't want to leave their churches, temples, doctors or shopping they are familiar with."

The cost of making changes can start as low as several thousand dollars and climb into the tens of thousands.

"Usually, the tub is the big issue," says Tom Schreck, a general contractor in Huntington Station. "We'll replace it with a 5-foot-wide shower with a built-in seat. Most houses aren't wheelchair accessible, so we widen doors to 42 inches for a parent who uses a wheelchair."

Clients often ask contractors to remove doorway thresholds, add grab bars, install safety glass on showers and put in controls that are easy to turn, says Tom Farrell, president of A-Fab Building Corp. in Hicksville.

To make a bathroom large enough to fit a wheelchair, he will sometimes steal space from an adjacent closet or bedroom. "A direct replacement bathroom could cost $15,000, but eliminating a tub, making a larger shower, putting in floor drains and moving major plumbing around -- that can reach about $40,000."

There's always the option of building an extension onto the house for Mom and Dad. "If you're putting in a bigger room with its own private bedroom with kitchen and bathroom, that could range from $75,000 to $150,000," he says.

"We, as contractors, supply an architectural plan that gets submitted to the building department," says Farrell. "After that gets approved, construction could take three to four months."

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