Sheen's 'epic' comedy roast planned
An internal police document obtained Wednesday by The Associated Press shows that two officers have been removed from the department’s Special Operations Division. Officers from that division gave Sheen an escort April 19 from Dulles International Airport to a performance at DAR Constitution Hall. (April 3, 2011) Credit: AP
He has been roasted -- boy, has he been roasted -- by his former show, former employer, former producer and even (if you believe TMZ) his former "goddesses."
So in Charlie Sheen's case, this would seem to beg a reasonably obvious question: How much more roasting can you endure when you're already cinder?
Nevertheless, the former "Two and a Half Men" star will undergo a Comedy Central blistering on Sept. 10, to air on Sept. 19 -- one hour after the new, reconfigured Ashton Kutcher-ized version of "Men" bows on CBS.
"You could say I've been providing kindling for this roast for a while," said Sheen, in a statement. "It's time to light it up. It's going to be epic."
Duh. Of course it is, Charlie. And winning. And -- especially -- bleeped. (There is nothing on the channel, not even "South Park," that is bleeped with greater abandon than a Comedy Central Roast.)
A Comedy Central spokeswoman said Tuesday that the roasters and roastmaster have not yet been selected, but Sheen will be involved in the selection process. Will former co-stars Angus T. Jones and Jon Cryer get the call -- or, to rephrase, are they contractually allowed to take it? "Declining comment," said a spokesman for Warner Bros., which produces "Two and a Half Men."
Jeffrey Ross, the self-appointed "king of roasts" and author of "I Only Roast the Ones I Love," would appear to be the likely master of ceremonies in September. That'd make sense, since Ross actually already roasted Sheen when his "My Violent Torpedo of Truth" tour hit Atlantic City.
Said Ross, in closing that show: "Next time, you should take this tour in Australia. That way, you can see what your career looks like going down the toilet counterclockwise."
