The guido fist pump

Every geographical hotbed for guidos claims ownership rights over the origin of the guido fist pump. Long Islanders claim they invented it. The Jersey guidos say the art of pumping one's fist in the air to the beat of some house song rests on their shoulders.

And when the Staten Island and Howard Beach guidos get in on the discussion, well, it's a Pier 6 brawl. We're talking newscaster rumble like in "Anchorman."

But this is no time to start another "War at the Shore" over who rightfully has ownership rights to the guido fist pump, or GFP. Rather, let everyone unite at a guido summit like in the opening scene of "The Warriors" and embrace and teach the GFP to everyone. Below is the instructor's guide to help pass this dance move -- it's more art than dance -- to the masses.