'Jersey Shore:' Snooki Italian phrase guide

 A few months ago, I decided the gang from "Jersey Shore" needed some help with their Italian - you know, basic stuff like "where's the beach?" in Italian. But now I realize I was only scratching the surface..(graffiare la superficie.) They need a lot more help than I realized.

Here are some new phrases, translated:

"Hey, I'm Snooki. I always drive like this."

Ehi, io sono Snooki. Ho sempre guidano come questo.

 "No, Mr. Policeman. I'm reasonably (hic) certain that no alcohol was involved in this accident."

No, signor poliziotto. Sono ragionevolmente (HIC) certo che no alcol è stato coinvolto in questo incidente.

"What do you mean? That was a police car? It looked like just another stupid cheap Italian car..."

Che vuoi dire? Questa era una macchina della polizia? Sembrava solo un altro stupido auto a buon mercato italiano ...

"How much is bail?"

Quanto costa la cauzione?

"I wasn't the one driving. It was the bimbo Deena."

Io non era quello di guida. E 'stato il bimbo di Deena.