'Pistol' review: Rotten recounting of punk rockers' saga

 This six-parter directed by Oscar winner Danny Boyle ("Trainspotting") is based on Jones' 2017 memoir, "Lonely Boy: Tales from a Sex Pistol." 

Anyway, that's my cherished memory, also the image preserved in some documentaries — like 2000's "The Filth and the Fury'" — and now in this six-part rockudrama. "Pistol" likewise seeks to recapture the filth and fury but settles for something a little more sanitized — the punk rock version, let's say, of afternoon tea and crumpets.

Is it "Pistol" or have we (of a certain age) grown so old that the Sex Pistols are now humdrum has-beens? In that long-ago red-hot moment, anyone with a pair of ears knew there were far better bands (Ramones) and talents (Patti Smith) while anyone with a subscription to Creem knew the punk scene in New York City was more vital. But the notion of the "British Invasion'' still held such powerful sway that if the Brits had it — whatever "it" was — then it must be good. In fact, "Pistol's" most watchable episode is the last, covering the band's first and (effectively) only U.S. tour which crashed and burned after the 1978 concert at San Francisco's Winterland.    

But what comes before is the humdrum — a whole listless swath that spreads over scenes, characters, and episodes. Hardly anyone catches fire, including Johnny Rotten, although his spiked red hair does do a good impression of shooting flames. 

Part of what goes wrong is the making-the-band variety of storytelling. Almost (note the word "almost") like the Monkees, the Pistols were essentially a marketing stunt. Talented rock impresario McLaren had accurately read the room, so to speak, and decided that England's disaffected young was ready for a much sharper-edged version of the punk that was coming out of CBGB. Talent and musicianship didn't matter. In fact, the less of that the better. The Pistols were all about attitude and noise, also eventually (regrettably) expectoration and vomit. 

Nihilism was both their medium and message, also, for the most part, the story of "Pistol." But as a famous mad king (Lear) once noted, nothing comes of nothing and nothing much comes of it here either.