I AM GORGEOUS!

Combing through real estate listings can be entertaining -- especially when you come across a description so unusual that it makes you smile (and take notice, which is really the point). Take, for example, this traditional-style house for $1.995 million being built in Quogue that takes on a first-person description.

Attention-grabbing right out of the box, it starts with: "Please pardon my appearance! I am just being constructed on an acre of land that can also accommodate a tennis court. However, I am keeping my trees until my new owner decides they want tennis or not."

Chances are, whoever reads this will continue and get a kick out of what comes next: "I am tall with 9-foot ceilings . . . I have a pantry, laundry room, mudroom and a two-car garage."

The author, Michele Wilkinson of Jean Carbone Real Estate, who is marketing the 4,600-square-foot house, says that since it was under construction, she decided to make the listing a "little more unique."

As it turns out, her plan did generate a few calls, she says.

Playing it straight for now, the five-bedroom house also features two fireplaces as well as seven custom baths, a separate guest wing, a custom kitchen with an open breakfast area that opens to a covered porch and a heated, 20-by-40-foot gunite pool. "It's a beautiful home," Wilkinson adds.

Since the house is near completion, Wilkinson recently tweaked the introduction, omitting the pardon my appearance line.


10 TOP HAMPTONS SALES

Town & Country Real Estate recently released its annual Top 10 Most Expensive 2011 Hamptons Sales report, which includes a couple of surprises.

Starting with the numbers -- all 10 sales were more than $20 million, says chief executive Judi Desiderio, noting that hasn't happened since 2007. "The high end came back with a good thrust this year," Desiderio says.

But perhaps even more stunning is that for the first time ever, the top sale occurred north of Montauk Highway. That would be the $36 million sale of Tyndal Point, a 55-acre estate in North Haven, which Desiderio describes as having captivating views straight across to Connecticut.

Here's a glance at the other nine top sales:

* Meadow Lane in Southampton, $32.5 million

* Meadow Lane in Southampton, $25 million

* Crestview Lane in Sagaponack, $24 million

* Eel Cove Road in Wainscott, $23 million

* Parsonage Lane in Sagaponack (the only top seller without a water view), $22.5 million

* Meadow Lane in Southampton, $21.6 million

* Ocean Road in Bridgehampton, $20.5 million

* Old Beach Lane in East Hampton, $20.45 million

* Millstone Brook Road in Southampton, $20.4 million

-- LISA DOLL BRUNO

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