Bagels await their schmear at the Bagel Boss store in...

Bagels await their schmear at the Bagel Boss store in Hicksville. (Jan. 29, 2009) Credit: Newsday/Joel Cairo

Here’s a curious one. Posted on craigslist’s Long Island food-and-beverage job board today was a want ad for a “Bagel roller — Habla Espanol (Madison, WI): Full-time bagel roller needed for busy Madison, WI bagel shop. Travel expenses, room and board included. Only experienced rollers need to apply. Habla Espanol.”

I’m envisioning an immense, free-standing establishment, Cheesehead Bagels, on the outskirts of Madison, where bagels are hecho 24 hours a day. The workers, who live in an attached dormitory, spend their off hours dreaming about New York pizza and trying to remember to say “pop” when they want a soda.

Bagels at Bagel Boss in Hicksville