Veterans project at cemetery helps preserve legacies

Army 1st Sgt. Patrick Ayers would always tell his family that the military guided his life and taught him how to conduct himself.

Ayers served in the National Guard during the Vietnam War before moving to the Army Reserve and the Military Police where he guarded prisoners, including at Fort Knox in Kentucky, and trained soldiers.

Ayers, who died a decade ago, also was on call during the original Gulf War before his retirement from the armed forces.

"He was an extremely proud man to be in the military," said his daughter, Jennifer Ayers of Baldwin. "He always said, 'The military will shape you; teach you discipline.' "

Earlier this month, Jennifer Ayers was among the first Long Island families to submit an online biography of her father for the Pinelawn Memorial Park and Arboretum's new Veterans Legacy Project.

In advance of Memorial Day, the online project honors veterans buried at the cemetery in appreciation of their bravery and service.

"The families have such pride in their loved ones, but we don't know all the stories," said Kristyn Hovanec, director of community outreach at the memorial park and arboretum. "I think it's so important for us to be able to tell the story or remember somebody by speaking about them and by saying their name out loud."

Family members are asked to submit pictures, preferably in uniform, and to complete an online form on Pinelawn's website to help provide details of their loved ones' service, along with personal memories and remembrances. To date, nearly 20 families have made submissions, Hovanec said.

The stories will be highlighted each month on Pinelawn's website and social media pages, and bouquets of flowers will be left on the headstone of each honored individual. Participants also were provided VIP tickets to this weekend's Bethpage Air Show at Jones Beach, where Pinelawn is an event sponsor.

“We want to pay tribute to the many men and women who have served our country and are resting peacefully now at Pinelawn," said Justin Locke, president and chief executive of the memorial park and arboretum. "Their sense of duty and patriotism is like no other, and in a world now when heroes need to be celebrated, we want to do our part in helping our families honor and remember their loved ones’ brave contributions to our country.” 

Hovanec said the project grew out of the COVID-19 pandemic when many families were unable to have proper funerals and burials because of capacity restrictions and health concerns.

In the fall of 2020, Pinelawn began hosting vigils for recently deceased individuals, followed by monthly grief healing workshops.

"We recognized that for the families that are here, their loved ones are not just a name. They have a story and they have a legacy, and this is much more than their final resting place," she said. "After the vigils and the grief support workshops, we'd see these families every month reach out and start telling the stories of these veterans."

Dawn Lloyd of Long Beach submitted a profile of her father, Air Force veteran John Lloyd, who served in peacetime from 1955 through 1958. Lloyd, who died in 2020, was based out of MacDill Air Force Base in Florida and spent much of his tour stationed in England.

"I love my dad and he loved his family and his country," said Dawn Lloyd, who has multiple family members still serving in the armed forces. "So it was my pleasure just to take part in this project. He loved his country and honored his country as he did his family."

Lloyd said her father had a difficult upbringing, as both of his parents died by the time he was 11 years old, and he grew up in a foster home.

"So my brother and I were raised in the kind of household where my dad and mom sacrificed so much, especially my dad, to make our life better than the way he grew up," she said. "And he totally succeeded at that. And I know he succeeded at taking care of our country as well."

Jennifer Ayers said her father was so much more than a veteran. 

Patrick Ayers, she said, was the oldest of 11 brothers and sisters. He worked for Verizon for 42 years, first in the yard cutting cable and later moving into an executive position. Ayers had two daughters, five grandchildren, a great-grandson he never had a chance to meet, and died just weeks from his 40th wedding anniversary.

"He was generous, kind, honorable man," Jennifer Ayers said. "He had the best dad jokes; you know, the corny ones. He absolutely loved being a grandfather. Those kids could do anything to him, and he took it and then some. The family as a whole misses him. He was the glue."

By Robert Brodsky

robert.brodsky@newsday.com@BrodskyRobert

Robert Brodsky is a breaking news reporter who has worked at Newsday since 2011. He is a Queens College and American University alum.