A lesson from a colleague that stretches across time
Alvin Bessent, longtime Newsday editorial writer. Credit: Valerie Graves Bessent
My former Newsday colleague, Alvin Bessent, presented with a seemingly surprising point of view that made more sense once the perspective of the speaker was explained, would say, “Where you stand is where you sit.”
It’s an obvious point, but an easily forgotten one. How many times has a person’s perspective appeared irrational until we learned some seminal fact of their life?
He grew up terribly poor, or rich.
She lost a child, or both parents, very young.
He’s a recovering addict.
She was injured in the war.
He was on the pile after 9/11.
She survived the camps.
He emigrated from Cuba.
“Oh!” we say. “I still don’t agree … but I GET it.”
The best examples are the situations in which individuals move between different stances as their lives change.
For Alvin, his stance on guns was a great example of beliefs shifting as one’s seating location changed. He’d grin as he explained his paradox, with a beam that could melt rocks, because Alvin was a wise enough taleteller to make self-deprecation his secret sauce.
“When I’m shooting guns in rural Georgia with my extended family, I’m all in for the 2nd Amendment,” Alvin would say. “Down there it makes sense to me that law-abiding Americans should be able to own and enjoy the weapons they want. But in Manhattan and Long Island, when I’m driving the roads here, or walking the streets, or riding the subway … I believe in nationwide gun control. We can’t let such dangerous weapons be bought in Georgia legally to end up being used in crimes here.”
I have a similarly split personality on many issues, usually based on whether I’m working one job or two. I’m a restless, hypersocial guy who loves to meet people and drives loved ones nuts if I’m around too much, and for much of my adult life (including now), I’ve worked a second job, in various service industries.
But working a second job invariably moves my politics rightward, particularly on social safety net issues.
When my only “work” is the artful dodge of opinion journalism, I still feel pressed for time, harried (and broke). When I did not moonlight, it mostly was because of child-rearing obligations, or the demands of my day job (this nation isn’t going to ruin itself!), or because my wife told herself my household help made listening to my babbling worthwhile.
But working just one job never felt easy, at all. So my perspective then, on college-loan relief and a bunch of other government help, was, “I need help, you need help, everybody needs help, PLEASE HELP!”
But once I have a second job, my instinct is to oppose programs that will help people who have only one job, or none, because, "Why should I pay back your college loans, Mr. Onejob?”
We sometimes say political beliefs are inexplicable, but people’s views can usually be understood based on their lives. We still might disagree, but disagreeing is far superior to dismissing.
Alvin died Monday, and will be buried in the cemetery of the church his family founded in Wadesboro, Georgia. He was the best I ever saw at disagreeing agreeably, and at maintaining composure, kindness and dignity in the face of any provocation.
Where he sat could and did affect where he stood, as it does for all of us, but it never altered how he treated those who stood with him, or against him.
Columnist Lane Filler's opinions are his own.
Lane Filler is a member of the Newsday editorial board.
