The cast of "The Real Housewives of New Jersey."

The cast of "The Real Housewives of New Jersey." Credit: Bravo Photo

What happened after Teresa went ballistic and tossed a table at "prostitution whore" Danielle? Anyone who saw the first season's final shocker will, of course, want to see what happens next.

The problem is that nothing too interesting has happened, besides two pregnancies, a lifesaving weight loss for one of the husbands and a couple of romances involving some of the grown-up kids. Danielle is still as much of an arrogant, bratty, needs-to-get-a-life troublemaker, and castmates hate her just as much as they did before.

Except for Dina, who in the premiere has gone all spiritual and says she texts Danielle from time to time to "stay in the positive." Upcoming highlights indicate that her new Zen-like attitude won't last too long. How predictable.

My say: The best materia is actually the least melodramatic, like a scene in whie Teresa's extended family sets up its annual apple sauce-making operation out of the garage or her sprawling, marble-and-fountain-detailed, multimillion-dollar McMansion. When her friend comes by to help, Teresa's old-world father wants to know if she has her period. The belief, Teresa explains, is that a woman shouldn't be involved during "that time of the month." Too bad women can't get a monthly pass for cleaning the house, paying the bills and shuttling the kids around.

The interactions between the housewives and their husbands also make for interesting viewing, if only to get a sense of what happens in other people's bedrooms. When Caroline takes husband, Albert, to buy a new suit at Barneys after shedding 70 pounds, the hard-nosed matriarch weeps over "how beautiful" he looks. His response? "What, are you snorting crack?" Talk about saucy.

Bottom line: Fans will have to stick it out and see how the season progresses. It looks like the police will be involved somwhere along the line, and there will be an incident involving a knife. But whether this recipe is spicy enough is another matter entirely.

Grade: A-

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