These two shutterbugs should shutter up

THE SHOW "Double Exposure"

WHAT IT'S ABOUT Indrani (Julia I. Pal-Chaudhuri) and Klinko are once-married high-end fashion photographers who split up but have remained business partners. From a Manhattan studio loft (One Hudson Square), they shoot celebrities like, well, name a celebrity -David Bowie, Beyoncé, Keanu Reeves, Jay-Z.

The rapper Eve gets the treatment Tuesday night, with others to follow (including Lindsay Lohan, with whom Indrani was briefly romantically linked a few months back). They shoot all the biggies, because as Klinko - who deems himself the "James Bond of fashion photographers" - immodestly explains, "It's the ultimate moment in their career because they will never look better."

They head out to Los Angeles in tonight's pilot where they do a shoot with fashion designer Kai Kuhne; a poor model is forced to walk a ledge. Of course, she's afraid of heights.

MY SAY "We're like a monster with two heads," says Indrani, and you nod in silent affirmation while wondering: "which monster? There are so many possibilities to choose from." A long-standing rule in TV says you should at least like a show's protagonist. This two-headed monster is not likable. (Bravo neglects to mention that they filed for bankruptcy last year owing a creditor - according to news reports - $335,000.) Klinko is a brusque martinet who barks demands at underlings. After a while, I took to calling him Col. Klinko.

Indrani whines and natters incessantly, blaming Col. Klinko for taking a larger hotel room than hers, or for trying to scuttle her shot "because he is terrified that I would get the great shots and then know that I don't need him anymore." Col. Klinko yammers back that he must have his bigger hotel room, he must have his perfect shot. . . . And so on. The sound of a jackhammer would be preferable.

BOTTOM LINE So, this is the fun, glamorous world of high fashion? No, this is a headache.

GRADE D+