Asking the clergy about conversion

How would you advise someone considering converting to a different faith?

If faith is a journey, can you get off at various exits and still get to your destination? For some, leaving their faith may also involve leaving family members and their community structure. Whether you're converting or trying to find reasons to stay, our clergy offer clarity.

The Rev. Margaret H. Allen, consulting minister, Unitarian Universalist Fellowship at Stony Brook, East Setauket:

Unitarian Universalism is a faith that attracts people from other faiths. In our newcomer classes, we hear those stories. We ask how UU can support them as they continue on their religious path. One of our central tenets is that revelation is not sealed. The message of the Holy Being is still emerging. Seeking a deeper relationship with the Holy Being is a lifelong endeavor.

As you grow, what you need in a faith changes. It's OK to change as your understanding of yourself and how things work changes. People who are looking also usually are looking for a community where they can be honest about what they're feeling and thinking. And, the religious path they're on may lead them to a new faith, or back to their own faith with a new understanding.

The Rev. Paul Quevedo, The Reformed Church of Locust Valley:

I'd want to know what it is they're looking for. Most are looking for a mode of faith that speaks to them. I'd like to sit down with them to know why they are leaving their current faith. I'd remind them that most paths that lead you to God are good paths.

My concern is that someone might leave faith communities all together. That saddens me. Then, I'd ask what it is about their religious body that doesn't satisfy them and makes them feel they want to walk away.

As clergy, we need to understand where we come from but also look at the world of 2011. You can look at soccer fields on Sunday and see that people are walking away from faith as we knew it. Our responsibility as clergy is to make sure they know that the door is always open for them to return.

Rabbi Meir Mitelman, rabbinical educator, Hofstra Hillel; and Hofstra University Jewish chaplain, Hempstead:

Any time someone is considering converting out of the faith he or she grew up with or were born with, it is a sensitive issue.

It is extremely important to think carefully and honestly through why you're interested in making a change. You also need to consider that there might be other possibilities of sources of knowledge and experiences in your religion that might cast a fresh, new light on your faith.

Maybe you've practiced your religion in certain ways, and perhaps there's a broader scene that would make it something you'd love to stay with.

Faith really is a journey, and you may find aspects that are more meaningful at different times in your life.

Any religion has its challenges. Maybe the faith you grew up with has shaped your feelings now. There are some real dynamos in every religion and exposure to those types of clergy may allow you to come away with a different feeling, a feeling of renewal.

The Rev. Dr. Constance Y. Pak, United Methodist Church of Ronkonkoma, Lake Grove:

I'm a fourth-generation Presbyterian and am now a United Methodist minister, so I understand the need for change. Twenty years ago, I didn't know a soul in the Methodist system.

I would want to talk to them to find out what makes them feel the need for a change. You want to understand what they think the other denomination will offer them.

For example, some denominations are more open to women as clergy. Others are focused on social justice as well as personal salvation. I would try to help them explore what it is they feel is lacking or they need at this point in their faith journey. All faiths are good, but it is about the person's belief system. How can we, as clergy, help you on your faith journey?

Seemi Ahmed, Muslim chaplain, Hofstra University, and board member of the Islamic Center of Long Island, Westbury:

If a person wished to embrace my faith, I would welcome their decision. As I believe that my religion is my path to salvation, I would want my fellow human beings to also attain salvation.

If a person wants to leave my faith, I would ask them their reason for this decision. What made them turn away and what is it they see in the path they are about to embark on? Eventually, what it comes down to is what the Quran states in chapter 2: "There is no compulsion in religion." Compulsion is incompatible with religion because religion depends upon faith and will, and these would be meaningless if induced by force.