All-night work leads mom to sleep all day

DEAR AMY: I am the mother of two boys younger than 2. I work 60 and sometimes 70 hours each week. I am not home much. I work a 6 p.m.- to-6 a.m. shift. I am rarely awake when my children or my boyfriend is, so he gets frustrated with me. I try to spend time with my kids, but I am exhausted. My boyfriend will not look for work or help financially, leaving all the burden to support our family on me. Do you think I am wrong for sleeping all day? What should we do?Exhausted

DEAR EXHAUSTED: Working the overnight shift is the most stressful and exhausting work schedule there is, but if your boyfriend is caring for two toddlers (I am assuming he is home with them), then he is exhausted, too -- and he is contributing to the family by raising, feeding, playing with, reading to and carting around the children.

If your kids are doing well and if your household is solvent, then perhaps you should table the question of his working outside the home for now.

You are not "wrong" for sleeping during the day, but you should be as disciplined about your sleep schedule as you are about your work schedule.

If you can get to sleep by 8 a.m., you should be able to get the kids up from their afternoon naps and have dinner with them (breakfast for you) each day before you go to work.

Because you are the breadwinner, your boyfriend should run the household to maximize your health and well-being.

If he is the at-home parent, you should do everything possible to maximize his experience and appreciate what he does, too.

In functioning and hardworking households, it's important that each parent does his/her best to support the efforts of the other.