Ask Amy: A pregnant snorer's selfish husband

DEAR AMY:I am 8 1/2 months pregnant with my second child. I am a stay-at-home mom. My pregnancy is causing me to snore. My husband wakes me up throughout the night to tell me to stop or get me to change positions. I've asked him to stop waking me because it is really hard for me to fall asleep as it is and after he wakes me up, I sometimes can't fall back asleep forat least an hour. He says that because I stay at home with our 2-year-old son, I can nap in the afternoon - and that he needs his rest for work. I found out that when he was on a business trip he had to share a room with someone who snored. I teasingly asked him if he woke that person up throughout the night. My husband said the person's snoring didn't bother him because he wore earplugs. I asked him to wear earplugs at home and said I'd set my alarm and wake him when he needed to get up for work. He shrugged off my suggestion and continues to wake me. It's gotten so bad that I've started sleeping on the uncomfortable guest bed, tossing and turning most of the night. I think he's being a selfish jerk and should let me sleep. What is your take?

--Mad Mom

DEAR MAD: If earplugs worked for your husband and he bothered to wear them in your bed, neither of you would wake up during the night. His refusal to do so must remind you of your toddler's behavior.

I assume you have checked with your physician and there is no cure for your temporary snoring, so the only other solution I can envision is for your husband to sleep in the guest bedroom during the last phase of your pregnancy.

Your husband is being selfish. Assume that sleep deprivation has made him cranky.

Try to open this topic with him during a neutral moment by saying, "I'm sorry about the snoring. I know it's disruptive. Can you help me think of a solution so we can both get more sleep at night, honey?"