Ask Amy: It's never too late to say goodbye

`DEAR AMY: My husband's 87-year-old mother died in November. In January, his younger brother died, and last week he lost his father. We live in a small city, and all of these relatives lived here for a few years at one time or another. No obituaries were ever put in the paper, but now I would like to enter one for each of these special people. Have we waited too long for his mother and brother?WonderingDEAR WONDERING: Many newspapers have paid death notices, where you can memorialize someone, including biographical information and a photo. Call your paper or check its website for guidelines. Online obits and memorials also are common (and can be helpful for notifying people of a person's passing). People reading these memorials can sign an online guest book and leave (and read others') memories. Check legacy.com (or do a search for "online obituaries") to see how this works. It's never too late to remember people you have loved.

DEAR AMY: I've been married for four years to a woman more than two decades younger than I am. We have been separated for six months because of her indiscretions, which have resulted in two unwanted pregnancies. She has been unfaithful throughout the marriage. Recently, through her confessions, I've learned that she had a fling with a member of our church, who has attempted to befriend me. She can't explain her atrocious sexual behavior and has refused counseling. I desperately want our marriage to work because I love her and I believe in the sanctity of marriage. I'm confused and frustrated because we're getting nowhere fast. I recently met a beautiful lady who is interested in me, but I'm afraid to let her into my life. Please help us. UpsetDEAR UPSET: I can't help your wife because she didn't write. And I can't tell you to finally throw in the towel on your marriage, but I urge you to talk to your pastor, who will help you define what a marriage is. You and your wife haven't really been "married," in any but the legal sense. She certainly hasn't been married to you. Your wife refuses counseling, but you should seek it for yourself. I agree that you shouldn't pursue or encourage another relationship until you are legally divorced.