Balancing relationships a life goal

DEAR AMY: I am a young professional, and I am having a difficult time balancing my long-term romantic relationship and the close relationship I have with my family. Both relationships demand a lot of time, and planning a weekend gives me a headache because everyone feels entitled to my time! I try to arrange my weekends so no one feels excluded, but I ultimately feel guilty, no matter what I do. At least one of these relationships will certainly suffer. How should I handle this?Weekend WoesDEAR WOES: This issue will revisit you throughout your life, especially if you choose to have children, creating more relationships that you must manage. The primary relationship is the one you have with yourself, and until you value that, you will never be able to balance the ancillary relationships in your life.

You will need to learn to say a firm, friendly and confident "no, thank you" to time demands that you can't -- or don't want to -- fulfill.

DEAR AMY: I have been in a serious relationship with my girlfriend for over a year. Our relationship has been very strong because we seem so good for each other. My girlfriend revealed that she recently had a conversation with an ex. It was not sexual, but he was a big part of her life for a long time. I don't like that she waited to reveal this. She lied to me for months through omission. I have lost some trust. We looked through each other's phones. There is now an underlying resentment on both sides. How can I help resolve this in a healthy way?Insecure

DEAR INSECURE: Honesty, disclosure and transparency are important, but you need to decide: Is any contact with this ex a deal breaker, even if you know your girlfriend is not reviving a relationship? If so, you better make it clear to her. If you stay, choose to trust.