Christmas shows to fill your stocking

Off the Wall wishes you the coolest Christmas ever.

OUR FAVORITES Yes, Virginia, there's a Christmas story on "The Lone Ranger" (Saturday at 7 a.m., Cozi TV/4.2). And there are many from the early TV family of "Ozzie & Harriet" (late Saturday night 12:30-2 a.m., Cozi/4.2). Ray loses it during the taking of a family portrait on "Everybody Loves Raymond" (Saturday night at 6, TBS. Ross becomes the holiday armadillo on "Friends" (Sunday at 11 p.m., Nick at Nite). Larry David makes a mess of the holiday on "Curb Your Enthusiasm" (Monday at 5a.m., TV Land). Mr. Hankey leads seasonal fun on "South Park" (Monday 8:30p.m.-midnight, Comedy Central). It's Festivus for the rest of us on "Seinfeld" (Monday night at midnight, WPIX/11). Santa's parachute fails to open in a memorable "Married . . . With Children" (Tuesday at 7 a.m., TBS).

MERRY MARATHONS Settle in all day Saturday for ABC Family's Rankin-Bass animation marathon from 7 a.m. to 3:30 p.m., including "The Year Without a Santa Claus" (1:30 p.m.).

Cartoon Network has Boris Karloff's "How the Grinch Stole Christmas!" Saturday (6 p.m.) as part of a 3-9:30 p.m. holiday block; there's another one Sunday 12:30-8 p.m. on Cartoon. Adult Swim salutes the season Sunday night 10 p.m.-6 a.m. on Cartoon, with "American Dad," "Family Guy," "The Boondocks," "Robot Chicken" and others.

Cozi TV goes (mostly) Christmas through Wednesday, starting at 6 a.m. Saturday with "Lassie" and continuing with such rarities as the '50s Betty White series "Date With the Angels" (Saturday at 4:30 p.m., Monday at 12:30 p.m.), "The Real McCoys" (Sunday at 7 a.m.) and "Make Room for Daddy" (Monday at 11:30 a.m. and 10:30 p.m.).

Antenna TV/11.2 starts celebrating Tuesday morning at 9 with "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians." It's followed at 11 with "Father Knows Best," "Hazel" and "Mister Ed" and many more holiday episodes through Thursday morning.

FESTIVE FILMS Catch a triple feature of Tim Allen in "The Santa Clause" (Saturday 6 p.m.- midnight, Sunday 1-7 p.m., ABC Family). Other favorites: Chevy Chase in "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" (Saturday at 4 p.m., ABC Family), Barbara Stanwyck's "Christmas in Connecticut" (Sunday at 2 p.m., TCM), Cary Grant in "The Bishop's Wife" (Sunday at 4 p.m., thisTV), Bing Crosby's "White Christmas" (Monday at 2 p.m. and 12:15 a.m., AMC), animation's "The Polar Express" (Monday at 8 p.m., ABC Family), Bill Murray's "Scrooged" (Monday night at midnight, ABC Family).

SERIES EPISODES Among the old and new: "The Haunting Hour" (Saturday night at 7, Sunday at 2 p.m., Hub), "Lois & Clark" (Saturday night at 1:30 and 2:30 a.m., Hub), "Monk" (Monday 11 a.m.-2 p.m., ion/31), "Will & Grace" (Monday 4:30- 6:30p.m., 11:30 p.m.-1:30 a.m., Logo), "How I Met Your Mother" (Monday 4-5 p.m., FX), "Two and a Half Men" (Monday 5-6 p.m., FX), "Moesha" (Monday at 7:30 p.m., Centric), "30 Rock" (Monday-Wednesday at 11:30 p.m., WNYW/5), "The Office" (Monday-Wednesday nights 12:30-1:30 a.m., WNYW/5), "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" (Monday night at 1 a.m., Comedy Central), "Highway Patrol" (Tuesday at 5:30 a.m., thisTV, "A Very Brady Christmas" (Tuesday at 7 a.m., ABC Family).

ONLINE OPTIONS Got a Roku? Check out channels like Classic Christmas TV, Retro Family Christmas and Christmas at the Drive-In . . . Network holiday episodes encore online at watchabc.com ("Modern Family," "The Neighbors"), cbs.com/watch ("The Big Bang Theory," "CSI"), fox.com/full-episodes ("Family Guy," "Brooklyn Nine-Nine," "Glee"), bit.ly/1cTM9lF ("Michael J. Fox," "Grimm"), and cwtv.com/cw-video ("Hart of Dixie").

MORE CHRISTMAS EVE/DAY HIGHLIGHTS See Tuesday's exploreLI for a full page of holiday options to celebrate -- or ignore -- the season.