Facebook OK if first love is just a friend

DEAR AMY: I have a nagging romantic fantasy that I can't get rid of. Twenty years ago I had a huge crush on a male friend in college. Just when I thought we might get together, he went away for the summer and met his future wife. I felt I had lost my first true love. We moved to different states and kept in touch for a few years (a couple of times a year). I have been happily married for almost 14 years. Over the years, I've wondered what might have happened with this other guy, but I let it go - until Facebook entered the picture. I got caught up reconnecting with friends from high school and college, and sure enough, he was in the mix (we have lots of mutual friends). I was so excited to look at his photos. Now I find myself having periodic dreams about him. In the dreams (as in real life), we are friends but are never romantic. I have worried that this isn't good for my marriage. I feel it's kind of like emotional adultery. I tried "hiding" from my friend on Facebook, but I see his comments on other friends' posts anyway. If I drop him as a friend, I feel as if I would need to explain why, and he knows nothing of this. My husband doesn't know he exists. What should I do?

--Confused

DEAR CONFUSED: You are feeling a sense of loss over a relationship that never happened - sort of like my love connection with Donny Osmond.

You didn't lose your first true love. You simply didn't consummate a crush all those years ago. Your dreams are a function of your trying to tie up this loose end.

If you can't handle this casual cyber-contact, then "unfriend" this person.

Don't create a friendship drama by feeling you need to explain yourself. This episode presents an opportunity for you to examine your life and then make a choice to grow up, put this in the past and recommit to your crush on your husband.