Veterans find community, locally and beyond, during the pandemic

When people began retreating to their homes to self-isolate at the beginning of the coronavirus outbreak, Dave Rogers said a switch flipped in his brain.

“One of the advantages of serving in the military and serving your country is that when an emergency comes up, your mind goes into a second mode,” he said. “You start thinking about, ‘OK this is what I have to do. I have to start reaching out to my people, I have to start finding out what’s going on, I have to find out where our resources are.’ “

He added that the severity of the situation didn’t actually hit him until five days into his own quarantine. “I was too busy trying to fall into that leadership mode,” Rogers said.

One of the ways the Patchogue resident is helping his “people” — specifically, his community of fellow veterans — is by hosting video chats on Zoom that he calls Coffee with a Veteran. Rogers started these gatherings three years ago at Roast Coffee and Tea Trading Company in Patchogue.

The meetups provide oral history lessons, and much more.

“We wanted to find a way to connect veterans with people in the community,” he said. “I think there are a lot of people who don't really understand what veterans go through on a daily basis, as well as veterans not really understanding how people perceive them.”

The gatherings took place once every three months, but now with Zoom, Rogers hosts Coffee with a Veteran calls every day at 12 p.m. He said people are tuning in from all over the country: veterans and civilians alike, from California, Georgia, Virginia and Connecticut, as well as his friends from Long Island.

Rogers, an Army veteran and Veterans of Foreign Wars (VFW) commander, served in the Gulf War and was part of the first-response team at the World Trade Center after the 9/11 terrorist attacks. He’s been stationed all over the world. 

“I’ve done a lot of deployments, a lot of missions within the United States, and even sometimes when you’re deployed, you’re by yourself for hours on end,” Rogers said.

Quarantine has brought back familiar feelings for him, and he isn’t alone.

“When I first got out, I isolated myself,” he said. “I was anti-social; I didn't talk to people. I went through years of isolation, and so I understood what it's like to be isolated from the world around you. So it was very important to me to ensure that I was providing a venue for veterans, and for people who have never been through isolation and never dealt with the idea of being alone, a chance to come together.”

As a commander for VFW Post 2913 in Patchogue and for the Suffolk County Council, Rogers has fundraised and donated 6,500 protective masks for facilities including the Long Island State Veterans Home at Stony Brook University and the Northport VA Medical Center. Rogers also advocates for veterans all over Long Island — he said Suffolk County has the largest population of veterans in New York State.

During the Coffee with a Veteran Zoom calls, Rogers hosts trivia, leads karaoke sessions and has even organized drawing classes. The hangouts are meant to be lighthearted, but he also encourages veterans to open up when they’re comfortable.

“I let veterans know if you don't feel like sharing, it’s fine,” Rogers said. “We’re telling jokes, we’re laughing, and we sometimes have a 'story day' where people share stories from their lives.”

Rogers plans to continue the Coffee with a Veteran video chats after conditions become safer to allow those joining from far away an opportunity to connect. He added that the calls are open for veterans and civilians, and those interested can reach him via email: dave-rogers1969@live.com.

The Long Island Museum in Stony Brook is also doing its part to give back to local veterans — in April, it launched The Pen Pal Project, where students can fine-tune their penmanship skills and make a friend by sending a letter to the Long Island State Veterans Home. Lisa Unander, the museum’s director of education, said she and her staff brainstormed creative ways to serve the public and make meaningful connections from a distance.

“We were thinking about how much we’re relying on technology now to keep us connected, but 150 years ago, keeping in touch with anyone who wasn’t in walking distance was through letters,” Unander said.

Now, the museum is encouraging students to pick up their dip (or ballpoint) pens and try their hand at Spencerian script. Letters must start with “Dear Veteran” and include some details about the student’s life and school, plus one or two questions for the veteran to answer. Then, the student can either take a photo of their letter or scan it, and email it so it can be printed at the veterans home for their new pen pal.

Unander said that there are about 10 partnerships so far. She’s found the veterans look forward to reading the letters just as much as the students do. Unander added that there are children as young as kindergarten-age participating, as well as eighth-graders — any student can take part, even if they don’t live on Long Island.

“It started as a local initiative but now people are trying to share it out of the area, so we’re pushing it,” she said. “We’ve seen the joy both sides of the partnership has been able to create; there’s no reason not to expand that beyond our community and keep bringing in more letters.”

The Long Island Museum’s website has more information on The Pen Pal Project.

By Rachel Weiss

rachel.weiss@newsday.com@RachMWeiss

Rachel Weiss joined Newsday in 2016. As a real estate/living multimedia reporter, Rachel writes feature stories and contributes to and appears in on-camera video packages. She was the lead reporter on Newsday’s LI Acts of Kindness series.