Sharing hotel room has daughter worried

DEAR AMY: My daughter is going on a team sports trip next month. There are seven girls going without parents (my daughter is one of them). These girls will be rooming in two hotel rooms. Two of the seven girls are lesbians. How should the team handle the rooming situation? One of the lesbian girls is in a long-term relationship and is also a friend of my daughter's. My daughter is not worried about sharing a room with her. However, my daughter calls the other girl 'sketchy' (her opinion). My daughter would definitely not be comfortable sharing a bed with her. Some of the other girls and probably most of the parents are unaware of the sexual orientation of the players. The ages are 13 to 19. The sexual orientation of any one of the players is not an issue except for this situation, especially considering the age differences. What would you recommend?

--Sports Mom

DEAR MOM: As you note, a player's sexual orientation isn't an issue otherwise -- and it shouldn't be an issue here, either.

Your unspoken assumption plays into a predator stereotype that simply isn't true.

The most important fact these girls should be aware of is that any sexual activity involving team members must be prohibited.

Sexual activity between an older and younger teen would also be illegal.

All participants should be educated about what is and is not permitted -- and this includes sexual behavior of coaches, other adults traveling with the team and fellow team members.

If your daughter has any reason to suspect a problem, she should take it to you and her coach.

You should also take your questions and any concerns to the coach in advance of the trip.

Your should arrange for your daughter to have a cot sent to the room. These are usually available for a small fee, and it seems a reasonable expectation.