She feels cheated by mother's estate plan

DEAR AMY: My mother is in her late 80s. She is planning to divide her estate equally between my brother and me.

However, I have recently learned that over the past 20 years, my brother has borrowed $160,000 from her. He has never tried to repay this debt and has never paid any interest on the money. My mother's response is that when she dies, I immediately get $160,000 off the top of her estate before the estate is divided. I, too, have borrowed from our mother, but I have repaid all the money, with interest, according to a contract. My objection is that my brother's unpaid money would be worth far more than $160,000. Even if he were charged a low interest rate of 3 percent or 4 percent, over a 20-year period that money would be worth two to three times that amount. My mother became angry when I pointed this out to her. Am I being unreasonable in voicing my opinion? My brother is more than happy with the arrangement.

Shorted DaughterDEAR SHORTED: You are not being unreasonable.

However, your mother is not a bank; she is your mother. She could choose to leave her money to a charity. She could choose to leave all of her money to you, your brother or a neighbor.

You have voiced your opinion on this deal; you are also receiving an extra lump sum of $160,000 that otherwise would have been absorbed into the estate and divided between you and your brother.

If he had responsibly repaid his loans over the years and your mother had invested these monies in the stock market (or spent it), her substantial estate might be worth far less now.

This is a large sum; this also is the arrangement your mother has chosen.

I suggest you accept her decision about how to divide her assets and move on.