She thinks son's girlfriend is bulimic

DEAR AMY: My son is 40. He and his new girlfriend stayed with us for a few days. She is very nice, but looks unwell. She never finishes her meals but loves sweets and always hits the bathroom after the meal. I think she may be bulimic. Should I mention something about this to my son?ConflictedDEAR CONFLICTED: I can think of several possibilities here, including the idea that she didn't like the food; that she may be suffering from an illness affecting the digestive tract; that she is undergoing treatment for another disease; or that she is pregnant.

You can't treat or cure this woman's eating disorder (if she has one). You can only judge her -- which it seems you are already doing.

Tell your son how much you enjoyed meeting his girlfriend and reflect back to him some of her qualities that you noticed and appreciated. Then ask him, "She didn't seem to feel well. Is she OK? And is there anything I should have done to make her more comfortable?" Your son can shut you down if he doesn't want to discuss it. Read his reaction and accept it.

DEAR AMY: Your answer to "Overflowed and Underfunded" about what a septic system can tolerate indicated there is confusion about what can be flushed. As a builder who gets calls about stopped-up plumbing, there are only three things that should be flushed down a toilet. You know what two of these things are. The other is bathroom tissue. Don't flush dental floss, paper towels, catfish skins and particularly those half-paper, half-cloth products labeled "wipes." Just because the package says the wipes are flushable doesn't mean they will disintegrate in the sewage. I've fixed a lot of this foolishness!BuilderDEAR BUILDER: May all our septic systems run as clear as your answer to this question.