Should she reveal husband's affair?

DEAR AMY: My husband has been having an affair with a married co-worker. I've just discovered that he also is involved with her in a business investment. He says they are doing nothing wrong, but the affair has been one cover-up after another. I am tempted to contact the husband of the affair partner. Is this ever OK?

Wounded Wife

DEAR WIFE: Telling this husband that his wife is sleeping with a random co-worker falls into the general category of "none of your business." But when that co-worker is your husband, it's very much your business.

Judging from the contents of my mailbag, roughly 67 percent of the time, spouses learn of an extramarital affair directly from the spouse of the affair partner. In fact, the mere thought of a vengeful/angry /sad spouse spilling the beans actually prevents affairs roughly 17 percent of the time.

OK, I made up these statistics, but you get my drift.

If you know without a shadow of a doubt that this is happening, to withhold this news means you would be keeping your husband's secret. And what is your motivation for doing that? Cheating spouses don't traffic in truth -- until they are forced to.

You have some decisions to make. Telling the truth is always a good place to start (though you should pre-emptively speak to a lawyer).

DEAR AMY: You've asked for "second chance" stories. Here's mine: I was raised in a high-control religion that teaches that the world is going to end any day now. As a result, I didn't go to college after high school, despite graduating with a 4.0.

My parents hadn't saved any money for college and wouldn't let me live with them if I did go.

In my late 20s, I got the chance to start college, and I grabbed it. I'll be graduating this May at the age of 34!Proud

DEAR PROUD: Good for you!