Single File: Low tolerance for guy-hating websites

DEAR SUSAN: It's not that men hate women. Not at all. What men hate is the open hostility a large majority of women have toward them. Many openly wear that hostility like a badge of honor. There are the guy-hating blogs and websites that try to look like satire. There's absolutely nothing ironic or satirical about that commentary. And that's where much of the venom and vitriol comes from.

BloggerDEAR BLOGGER:Agreed, the anti-male bigotry ignites much of the resentment that's bound to exist between the sexes. Ideally, it is merely benign banter about gender-related advantages (and dis-) that, approached with goodwill, makes for good fun and provocative puns. But none of the dialogue should trigger attacks or put-downs, indeed the lowest form of stupidity. The point of anti-male commentary is to make men unappealing, unlovable, even unlikable. How self-destructive can women get?! Even the media get into the act, reducing men to whimpering dependents calling for mommy to make things right. Not a laughing matter, about which I've railed loudly and often.

DEAR SUSAN: I am a single mother and really like a man I work with. (Yes, he's a single father.) Someone in the office said he also likes me. We seem to have a lot in common. We divorced for the same reasons, have the same number of children and share the same moral values. I'd like to go out with him, but I'm too shy to ask, and I feel he's the same way. Julie J., Long Island

DEAR JULIE:Someone's got to make the first move, so let's you and I concoct a plan that keeps you more relaxed. And in my mind, that's a plan that includes children (his and yours, that is). You seem to know a lot about him, important things, such as his moral values (in my mind the most important part of his resumé), and everything you know makes him more desirable. So let's set the stage for your outreach very carefully.

My first thought is a weekend picnic invitation, handwritten and given to him in the office. That seems to fit your comfort level, and because he seems to be as interested as you are, chances are the note will come back to you with an outsize YES written on it. Your next step is a phone call to him. Make clear that his children will be part of the fun, with yours as playmates. He'll probably go for the daylight aspect, with children running around while you two get to know each other out of the office, away from gossip and prying eyes.