You'll never go wrong with this prediction: The world isn't about to end.
If the world survives, you get to say, "I told you so." If the world does end -- well, no one's around to point out how clueless you were.
That's why Harold Camping's prophesy was so shortsighted. For months, the evangelical broadcaster had been warning his followers that the Rapture would arrive at 6 p.m. Saturday with the final universal destruction set for Oct. 21.
Notice anything so far?
Now Camping will have to explain how his calculations turned out wrong.
He probably should have stuck with easier predictions.
That Donald Trump wouldn't run for president. That real-estate prices in the Hamptons might slip lower, but that big houses by the beach will never be cheap. Easy stuff.
The rest of us will just have to console ourselves with the good news of our continued existence. Really, it's not the end of the world when doomsday prophets get it wrong.
1. Wait, don't cancel all my appointments.
2. Wall Street tipsters make mistakes too.
3. Yes, I used to mock the need for sunscreen.
4. This wouldn't have happened if he'd used the Outlook calendar.
5. Guess I should have paid those bills after all.
ASKED AND UNANSWERED: World end yet? OK, good . . . Did someone say, "President King"? "PRESIDENT King?" . . . The new tenants will put a SCHOOL in the old Cross Street School -- and Williston Park neighbors are objecting to THAT? . . . A $225,000 salary in Malverne and a $316,245 Commack pension? Is there any point at which Superintendent James Hunderfund says, "You know, I just don't feel right taking that much money away from the kids?" . . . "Property-tax cap" -- sounds good, right? So what's the catch, governor? . . . Hey, knucklehead, this isn't funny anymore. Who left the alligator on the LIE? . . . Zagat says the price of the average Long Island restaurant meal dropped for the first time since 1998. Am I eating in fancier places? How come my checks keep going up? . . . Is it possible for the Long Island Sound to have TOO MANY striped bass? After a while, reeling them in hardly counts as a sport!
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People read around here. Write too. Need proof? More than 250 writers, including some of LI's most prestigious poets, authors and comedians, have already requested a chance to read their stuff at the fifth annual Summer Gazebo Reading Series on Schoolhouse, which kicks off Monday, June 6 at the Schoolhouse Green in Oceanside. "Once again, we've had to turn away writers," said lawyer, novelist and series founder Tony Iovino. "That's the hardest part of this endeavor." Opening night features Judy J R Turek, Linda Tagliaferro, Talia Carner and Elizabeth Rowe - and the words just keep on coming.
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