DEAR AMY: My two teenage daughters are occasionally asked to baby-sit. On more than one occasion, a family has canceled at the last minute, either because a child is sick or because their plans have changed. This leaves my daughter with nothing to do; it's especially frustrating because she's counting on the money she would have earned, and may have turned down another baby-sitting job in order to commit to this one. When my husband and I were the ones hiring the sitter, if we had to cancel at the last minute we still gave the young woman a small token, such as two hours' pay or a gift card, so her evening wasn't a total loss. What are your thoughts? 
 --Stood-Up Sitter 
 DEAR STOOD-UP: Any freelance worker deals with the issue of last-minute cancellations from time to time, and your daughter should chalk this up to "stuff happens." If this happens so often that it is cutting into her business, in the future she could tell all parents when they call for a sitter that she has a policy of charging a fee equal to two hours work for a same-day cancellation. 
 Your own thoughtfulness in dealing with last-minute cancellations is ideal. 
 DEAR AMY: I was saddened and appalled with your response to the woman whose husband is a perfectionist. She should work with him? Really? You fail to understand that there is nothing she can do to satisfy the guy. He's the type who wants perfection reflected back at him in every part of his life, especially at home where he can manipulate and control to his heart's content. Living with someone like this is soul-draining -- her best efforts to help will never be good enough. 
 --David 
 DEAR DAVID: This couple had been married for a long time; the wife didn't seem to be having her soul drained, but she was definitely annoyed.

DEAR AMY: My two teenage daughters are occasionally asked to baby-sit. On more than one occasion, a family has canceled at the last minute, either because a child is sick or because their plans have changed. This leaves my daughter with nothing to do; it's especially frustrating because she's counting on the money she would have earned, and may have turned down another baby-sitting job in order to commit to this one. When my husband and I were the ones hiring the sitter, if we had to cancel at the last minute we still gave the young woman a small token, such as two hours' pay or a gift card, so her evening wasn't a total loss. What are your thoughts? --Stood-Up Sitter DEAR STOOD-UP: Any freelance worker deals with the issue of last-minute cancellations from time to time, and your daughter should chalk this up to "stuff happens." If this happens so often that it is cutting into her business, in the future she could tell all parents when they call for a sitter that she has a policy of charging a fee equal to two hours work for a same-day cancellation. Your own thoughtfulness in dealing with last-minute cancellations is ideal. DEAR AMY: I was saddened and appalled with your response to the woman whose husband is a perfectionist. She should work with him? Really? You fail to understand that there is nothing she can do to satisfy the guy. He's the type who wants perfection reflected back at him in every part of his life, especially at home where he can manipulate and control to his heart's content. Living with someone like this is soul-draining -- her best efforts to help will never be good enough. --David DEAR DAVID: This couple had been married for a long time; the wife didn't seem to be having her soul drained, but she was definitely annoyed.

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