Hopeful still after a stormy year
Rose Marie Jauregui lives in Ronkonkoma.
A year's worth of dust and old Christmas tree pine needles were finally swept away and the fall cleaning was done. But this was mid-December, a full year late - a year filled with worry and uncertainty, but joy, too.
Just before Thanksgiving 2009, the family was involved in a head-on collision. What started as a quick jaunt to the Smith Haven Mall for my husband and me and two of our children quickly became a nightmare when an oncoming car crossed over into our lane. The loud bang, the smoke-filled car and the ambulances are all bad memories of a horrible night. We were all thankful that the family survived with minor bumps and bruises. The other driver died of his injuries.
Two days later came more bad news. The doctor found the reason for a swallowing problem I'd had. It was adenocarcinoma, or esophageal cancer. I was not in any high-risk group, yet here I was about to start a journey I never expected. I gathered my four kids together and, with my husband, announced we would fight this with all we've got.
We treated trips into the city for doctor appointments as vacation days, acting like tourists and ignoring the real reason for the visits. The chemotherapy, radiation and surgery seem like a dream now.
The extensive surgery took my esophagus and stomach, but not my spirit. I spent two weeks at the hospital in Manhattan, imagining it was a fancy hotel with room service and a great view of the skyline. All along were the usual events of our family's year - a sweet 16 celebration, college applications, prom, concerts, school trips, an exchange student from Italy. The boys moved to college dorms. Friends became grandparents, and in some painful moments, loved ones passed on.
Both the accident and the cancer experience have made me more patient and mellow. This past week, I admired the snowy weather. Its stillness was a welcome break. I let the person with 12 items check out ahead of me on the seven-item line at Pathmark. I slowed down on Vets Highway to let the guy on the cell phone cut me off. Maybe it was an important call to bring home diapers.
I greet this new year thankful for every day I wake up to the routine of life. There aren't enough thanks to go around for all the family and friends who prayed for me in their many languages and faiths. I appreciate everything that happens during the day, thinking there must be a reason for it. The most joyful news was that the cancer was cured. I guess there's more I need to do in my life. I'm ready now for more dust and pine needles.
