OPINION: Hard times are harder on kids, but there are resources to help

Gregory J. Blass is the commissioner of the Suffolk County Department of Social Services. John E. Imhof is the commissioner of the Nassau County Department of Social Services.

Last month, in the middle of a once-in-a-century nor'easter, around 150 mourners came to pay their respects to Baby Hope, the newborn found dead in a Yaphank garbage transfer station in January. The Mass and turnout were a moving, final tribute to Thomas John Hope.

For many, it is inconceivable to grasp what led to the death of this baby. Yet, although such an outcome is rare, the circumstances are all too common: a distressed mother has no place to turn, no understanding family, no paternal support, an inability to care for the baby financially, or she is just too young to understand the options or to know what is right.

Everyone in Suffolk and Nassau counties must understand that there are places for distressed, pregnant women or mothers of newborns to turn, thanks to safe haven laws. Women in labor can go to any local hospital where, without providing identification, they can safely deliver their babies and leave them there without criminal penalties. There, each baby is cared for as the receiving hospital works, as state law requires, with local social service agencies to ensure that the baby is placed in a loving and nurturing home environment. This gives the mother a chance to reclaim the infant if she has a change of heart.

In addition to hospitals, anyone may leave a newborn in a designated safe location, including police precincts, firehouses or any safe place willing to accept the child.

It is a terrible thing that for Baby Hope, it is too late. But there is no reason that any Long Island mother should feel so isolated that she harms her baby. Anyone can call 866-TLC-BABY in Suffolk County or 516-227-8405 in Nassau to give up her baby without identifying herself, and be given every chance - but only if she wants - to take her child back. As the law requires, there are no questions asked. The focus is to give the child a chance at life.

Tragedy for children is not specific to newborns. Certainly the economic crisis has played a major role in a rise in child abuse and neglect. As more adults face unemployment, lower wages and homelessness - as they become overwhelmed with financial difficulties - they struggle to decide whether to pay for rent, a utility bill or food. These stressors, often coupled with alcohol abuse or situational depression, can cause these parents to become anxious, more aggressive and short-tempered, and they often direct their frustration at their children or neglect them altogether.

In 2009, Suffolk County received 10,053 new reports of child abuse and neglect, surpassing the 10,000 mark for the first time, and representing a 5.4 percent increase in reports over 2008. Nassau County noted a 4 percent increase in Child Protective Services reports, and a 300 percent increase in the incidence of violence against children, resulting in arrests, associated with these reports.

The realities of raising a family during an economic crisis can trigger even the best-intentioned parents to neglect or harm their children. We constantly work with families that are barely holding on. It is important that these families learn about the services and benefits the county departments of social services can offer, which can help bridge the financial gap to self-sufficiency and avoid family violence. It is not only OK to ask for help; during these harsh times, it may be necessary.

Asking for help doesn't make someone a bad parent - quite the opposite. Good parents use the available resources to meet their children's needs, whether for food, medical care, child care, home heating fuel, housing or aid for an unexpected financial emergency.

We're hopeful that today's economic difficulties won't last too much longer. We are all in this together, navigating these worst of times. Our two counties are in a very real sense one community, and we shall weather this storm together with tolerance, sharing and compassion.