Wheary:The most stressful time of the year

Jennifer Wheary is a senior fellow at Demos, a public policy organization in Manhattan.

Need a boost? Most people do at some point during the jam-packed five and a half weeks between Thanksgiving and New Year's Day.

So consider visiting the Jim Henson exhibit on display at the Museum of the Moving Image in Astoria through Jan. 16. Henson was the imaginative creator of the Muppets, those lifelike and expressive characters who are loved by millions worldwide. There's a wise sentiment summing up Henson's approach on a sign about halfway through the displays: "The theme of optimism outwitting and overcoming adversity can be found throughout Jim's work."

That's an important theme to keep in mind right now, at the official start of the holiday season. While for many, December's holidays are associated with hope and optimism, there's plenty of adversity -- crowds, deadlines, bills, high expectations, endless to-do lists -- that can get in the way. It's a very stressful time of year.

Most of us look forward to celebrations and spending time with family and friends. But according to a report released by the American Psychological Association in 2006, 61 percent of Americans report experiencing holiday stress. Fifty-two percent of us report being more irritable at this time of year, and 68 percent of us say we are more fatigued.

Money is also huge holiday worry. According to the association's figures, 62 percent of us report fretting about our personal finances during this season. High levels of unemployment and uncertainty about the national and local economies only make things worse. Even before the holidays started to add to the emotional burden, 75 percent of people in the New York metro area cited the overall economy as a main source of stress.

With all this going on, it's natural to assume a negative outlook. Yet such negativity is counterproductive -- it makes us less able to cope and see our way forward.

Of course, we all know on some level that stress is bad. But advances in brain science over the past two decades have taught us more about why -- about what happens to our bodies when our brains are caught up in responding to stress, and especially when they are inundated with negative thoughts. Our brains essentially lose their ability to see the whole picture and problem-solve.

In his book "Rewire Your Brain," John B. Arden, a psychologist and director of mental training for Kaiser Permanente, describes in layman's terms how the physiological and biochemical processes involved in seeing all sides of an issue shut down when people experience negative stress. Instead, we kick into a fight-or-flight response designed only for short-term self-preservation.

That response has value. If your hand touches a flame, you need to react quickly and use all of your neurological resources to get out of danger. Ditto if a car cuts you off or stops suddenly in front of you while you're looking for parking at a crowded mall.

But a short-term fighting stance is no way to solve larger, more complex problems -- whether they be in our personal lives or the broader society. If you're at a family get-together and a difficult relative insults you, shooting back an aggressive response will only escalate the situation, not defuse it.

There's no shortage of people who've made a career or a cause out of angrily complaining. Just look at the aftermath of the supposedly bipartisan deficit supercommittee or the heated arguments that have arisen between Occupy Wall Street and its detractors. Yet we know from neuroscience that accentuating the negative impairs our ability to solve or improve anything. Considering how much time political pundits, leaders and protesters spend battling, bashing and criticizing, one wonders if they're able to conduct the cognitive switch needed to problem-solve.

One thing is for certain. We need them to -- especially now. Unfortunately, negativity is what garners the most news attention and what often gets broadcast the most loudly. But it's not all that's out there. Many people are doing good things. Thousands of Long Islanders will donate to food banks or to holiday toy drives in the next few weeks, for example. And there are many nonprofits on the Island committed to making positive change in everything from environmental conservation to supporting education to helping end homelessness and alleviate poverty.

As we enter into the holiday stress season, let's try to tune out the negativity -- at least for a little while. There are many problems in our society that we need to address. Perhaps for this reason we need to give negativity and those who want to spread it less attention. Plenty of people and organizations are productively and positively focusing on what can be done to make things better, rather than staying rooted solely in blaming others. Let's give them the spotlight for a bit.

Meanwhile, go see the Henson exhibit. First because Muppets are cute and funny, and we could all use a lighthearted break these days. But second so you can read this Jim Henson quote in the context of the trajectory of his hard work and the ups and downs of his career:

"I believe that we form our own lives, that we create our own reality, and that everything works out for the best." Those mired in negativity would like us to believe that kind of statement is delusional. Far from it. In these words lies the ability to seek solutions in a way that a complaint can never achieve.