Adoring dad can't shake Sandy Hook horror

DEAR AMY: Months after the Sandy Hook Elementary massacre, I am still haunted by the horrific nature of that tragedy.

I have no personal connection to Newtown, Conn. I am the adoring father of two sons who are in the same age range as the Sandy Hook child victims, and I think that has made this horror even more real and severe for me. For days after the shootings, I cried every day, and I continue to cry today. I have prayed constantly since that day for God to do the impossible by instilling peace in the victims' families. The pain of those left behind is overwhelming. I've felt so helpless all along. What can a mere human do to ease this sort of pain for other parents? I think some of this helplessness is a weird sort of guilt and also a fear for my own boys' well-being. I'm a normally upbeat, optimistic person, but I have not reached my usual level of joy and peace since this event. I'd appreciate your guidance.

Devastated From a Distance

DEAR DEVASTATED: It's understandable that you would be horrified, worried and even traumatized by the Sandy Hook attack. It is truly beyond comprehension and has shaken many of us to the core. Even though things seem to be improving slightly for you, you sound anxious and depressed.

Events such as the 9/11 attacks and the horrific crime at Sandy Hook can trigger depression in people who have no personal connection to the event. A therapist can help you express some of your own fears, explore your anxieties, obsessions and rumination, and talk about your worries for the future.

Any time you find that your usual temperament seems to be altered in the longer term, it is a sign that you need an evaluation and some treatment. Talking about this with a compassionate counselor will help you. Putting voice to your fears would ultimately be good for you and for your family. Once you feel better, you may be able to put your concerns and compassion to use for the greater good.