Deadbeat dad's addicted to mom's e-reader

DEAR AMY: A few months ago, my mom downloaded some free word games for her electronic reader. My dad started playing them, and now he's addicted. He has been unemployed for more than 18 years. When my sister and I were younger, he took care of us during the day while our mom worked. I am graduating from high school this year and my sister is a freshman. Now he does some chores, but then plays for hours every day. When he isn't playing, he watches old movies or does crossword puzzles. Our family's financial situation has become precarious, and our mom is on the verge of taking a second job to pay for everything on top of having to do more chores. She already works 40 hours a week. My sister and I pitch in more than we used to, but with school and extracurricular activities, we don't have time to do everything. How do we get our dad to put down the Kindle and shape up?

--Boggled in Madison

DEAR BOGGLED: Your father may not be able to simply "shape up." Your mother's taking a second job to support the family while your father obsessively plays word games will not help, either.

Your father has not been "unemployed" if he has been taking care of the family. Speak with your mother to urge him to see his physician to get a thorough checkup. It sounds as if he might be depressed.

DEAR AMY: "Missing My Brother" wrote that her father would not discuss her brother's death. You were right when you suggested they turn their attention to his life. I had a realization that I needed to do this to deal with my own grief. It really helped.

--Missing Too

DEAR MISSING: Our loved ones really do achieve a kind of immortality through our memories. The transition from ruminating on death to remembering someone in life is an important and positive onee.