Does turkey pay her debt for holiday meal?

DEAR AMY: For the last several years, I've been meeting with a small group of friends for a late holiday dinner. This year, the hostess has asked for $20 from each of us toward the cost of the meal, citing rising food prices. We agreed. Meanwhile, I was given a 20-pound turkey and told her that I would contribute the turkey to the meal and therefore shouldn't owe any money. She said the bird didn't count since I hadn't paid for it. I countered that it was still $20 less than she would have to spend. She got mad and called me a cheapskate, but I beg to differ. Which of us do you think is the cheapskate here?

--Sick of Turkey

DEAR SICK: I'm with you.

Your contribution has value, even if you didn't pay for it. If your friend wants to host a very low-cost dinner, she should consider running it as a potluck.

I dare say that this is not really about a turkey and a 20 dollar bill, however.

If you genuinely want this friendship to survive into the new year, you should ask your friend what is really going on before judging her too harshly.

DEAR AMY: I'd like to weigh in on the letter from "Kissed Consultant," who was shocked when a male client pulled her toward him and kissed her on the lips after a lunch meeting in a restaurant. Honestly, when I read the letter the first thing I thought was that she should have slapped him right across the face. I like to think I would have done that.

--Also a Consultant

DEAR ALSO: If only real life was like an old black-and-white movie, where a dame could slap a heel right across the kisser. That's certainly what Rosalind Russell would have done, and maybe it's also what you would have done, but just as an unwelcome kiss is an affront, a slap is a (potential) assault. Alas, life ain't like the old days.